Part of her wondered what would happen if she stuck it out, worked a little harder. Maybe she could endure past his hang-ups on family. After all, she'd studied about families dealing with post-traumatic stress syndrome.
Lori forced herself to stop. She wanted to be his wife, not his counselor.
She didn't regret stealing these last moments for herself, but she couldn't allow herself to weaken. She wanted a life with children and roots, a family who wasn't afraid to share their feelings and lavish love on one another.
Gray spread her hair like a blanket over her breasts. "Come with me to Washington."
He'd said it so offhandedly Lori thought she must have misheard. "What?"
He propped on one elbow, the lemon-yellow comforter pooling around his waist, and looked straight into her eyes this time. "Pack up. Move in with me in Washington."
Did this man live to confuse her? "Are you trying to send me running for the door like last time? Because if you don't want to have sex again, you can just say so. No need to go to such extremes to make me boot you out of my bed."
"No!" His arms locked around her as if she might run anyway. "I—" he swallowed heavily "—I want you to move in with me. I found this great house with a sunroom and a big yard. Lori, the past two weeks without you have been hell. It's time we both quit fighting it and give in."
Not exactly the most romantic declaration she'd ever heard, but he seemed to mean it. She considered it. How could she not? Then she looked deeper into his eyes.
He regarded her so warily, she couldn't tell which he feared more, her saying yes or no.
Why couldn't he have asked with his clothes on, damn him? She held strong all the same, and for good measure kept her eyes firmly planted on his face. "I have a job here. I'm building ties, putting down roots."
"Come anyway."
If he didn't understand she couldn't spend the rest of her life constantly on the move, he would never be able to give her what she needed. She wanted to build a stable home for herself, for her children, for the daughter she already had.
Still she yearned to go with him, to be with him. "I can't go."
"Because of your job."
"Because of Magda. I'm going to keep her, no matter how many courts and piles of paperwork I have to plow through. She's my daughter." Her words rolled free in an out-of-control tumble, not too different from her life at the moment. "Even if I could settle for your offer, I can't live with you. The courts will never go for that."
Gray eased off his elbow onto a pillow. His chest rose and fell deeply, twice. "Okay. Good point." Another deep breath later he continued, "So let's do it."
"Do what?"
"Get … you know." He shrugged. "Let's do it."
Lori sat up, scooting as far away from him and temptation as she could without falling off the bed. "Geez, Gray! You can't even say the word and you expect me to marry you? What about love? You know, some women expect that when a guy proposes. Silly me, I happen to be one of them."
Even though he didn't answer, Lori decided to take the biggest risk of her life. Relinquishing control didn't come easily for her, but she couldn't spend the rest of her life wondering what would have happened if she'd tried. She placed her hand on his heart as she offered him hers. "I love you, Gray. But I need for you to love me, too, or it will never work."
He blinked. Nothing more. The jerk simply blinked.
Lori yanked the covers off him. "Get out."
"No." He whipped the blanket off her and threw it on the floor. "I'm not going until we talk about this."
The stubborn look in his eyes told her well enough he wasn't budging his gorgeous butt from her bed until he got his way. Never in a million years would she have imagined she would run away from marrying Gray.
Lori swung her feet to the floor. She yanked her clothes on with vicious tugs before whipping her hair into a simple ponytail. "Fine, I'll go. I'm already late picking up Magda."
"Wait." Gray left the bed, stepping over the comforter pooled in the middle of the floor. "Give me three minutes to get dressed and I'll go with you."
"You're not invited." She spun for the door.
He grabbed her arm. "Okay, Lori. You want to hear the words? Fine. I have feelings for you. Feelings for you that won't turn me loose. And believe me I've tried." He drew in another one of those deep breaths as if bracing for combat. "I guess maybe you call that love."
She jerked her arm free. Did he have to trample all her dreams? Why not bomb her Barbie house while he was at it? Pain made her lash out. "Oh, wow! You're on a roll tonight, Major." She hitched her hand on her hip in her best aviator stud stance. "'Let's get … you know,' followed by 'I guess maybe I love you.'"