This was why.
“So I left you my house,” Kyle continues. “I know you don’t need a house, but someone will and you’ll know what to do with it. Anyway, this is supposed to be profound and all that and so far it’s pretty boring. But it’s weird talking to you in the future. I’m going to assume everyone is sad.” He stops to laugh. “Because I’m such an awesome dude. But what I really want to tell you is that… I love you.” He chokes up a little and takes a breath. “I really, really love you guys. All of you. Kali and Aiden too. Even Clyde and the guys downstairs. However it was that I died, I need you two to know that you did a good job. That I was happy. Yes, like everyone I had bad days, but I was happy. And I know you’re right down the street and I can end this recording and go see you myself—and I will, believe me. I’ve never wanted to hug you both so much as I do right now—but for some reason I feel like you’re gone and not me. Stupid, I know. And selfish. I always was kinda selfish. Anyway, I know you’re sad but don’t be, OK?” he continues. “Please know that you’re the best family a kid could ever ask for. Kali is the best sister, Aiden is the best friend… and life, you know? It doesn’t get any better than that.”
Kyle stops to take a breath, then lets it out slowly. “So goodbye. I guess that’s all I have left to say, just… goodbye. Oh.” He brightens a little. “And I sprang for the pro package of Dead Notes, which means you can leave me a message back. As many as you want, for as long as you want. I got you covered.”
I swear to God, I can hear him smiling.
“So do that. For sure. Because my Dead Notes account is paid in full for twenty years. If you need longer than that… well”—he chuckles—“get a life, OK?”
I’m wiping tears off my face, but this is so Kyle I’m smiling with him.
“That’s it,” he says. “I just love you. And… thank you. Your son, in this life and whatever comes next. Kyle.”
There’s a few moments of silence. Well, sniffling, so not silence. And then my dad says, “Your mother is crying again,” even though it’s clear he’s crying too.
“He was a good boy,” my mom says.
“The best,” Aiden whispers.
“Anywho,” my dad says, trying to force a cheerful mood. “I know it’s hard to hear him knowing that he’s gone forever now. But you two should listen to your messages.”
“Your dad and I weren’t sure we’d ever get over this, Kali,” my mom says, still sniffling. “We couldn’t imagine a life going forward without your brother. But this helped, sweetie. It really did. So don’t wait too long. He had something to say to you. And you too, Aiden. Let him have his last words.”
“We will,” Aiden says. Because there’s a prolonged moment of silence after my mom finishes talking where I’m supposed to answer her, but I don’t. “Maybe tonight,” Aiden assures her, looking at me.
“Good,” my dad says. “Well, I don’t know what you two have planned but have a good time.”
“And sorry if we ruined it,” my mom adds.
I get my act together and say, “You didn’t ruin it, Mom. You made everything perfect. Thanks for letting us listen in. I’ll let you listen to my message after I’m done.”
“You can listen to mine too,” Aiden says. “For sure.”
“Thanks,” my mom says, still sniffling like crazy. “Now go do something fun. Go do something Kyle would do.”
I nod and say, “We will, Mom. See you soon, I promise.”
After Aiden ends the call we just stare at each other, unable to process what just happened. But I don’t want this moment to fade, so I say, “My brother was an asshole genius.”
Aiden laughs, wiping his eyes. “He totally was. Both those things.”
“Who buys an app called Dead Notes?”
“Him,” Aiden says.
“Him,” I agree.
“Change of plans,” Aiden says.
“What do you mean? We’re not going out?”
“Oh, we’re going out. We’re going out Kyle-and-Kali-and-Aiden-style though.”
“Oh, God. You’re gonna make me build a fort, aren’t you?”
We both laugh. Then he pulls me in for a kiss and says, “Trust me. I know what Kyle likes.”
“I do trust you,” I say. “There is no other person alive I trust more than you, Aiden Edwards.”
“Good,” he says, smacking my ass. “Now go get dressed. And wear jeans and sneakers. This isn’t gonna be a fancy night.”
I turn and walk down the hallway to my room thinking about him, and me, and Kyle. And all the fun kid stuff we used to do. All the innocent trouble we got into over the years. Hitting balls through windows, crashing bikes into parked cars, climbing trees and stealing forbidden fruit.