'Totally crushed, i'faith,' he said, putting it on anyway. He seemed to feel better for that, and went on, 'Rain, yes, hail, yes, even lumps of rock. Fish and small frogs, okay. Women no, up till now. Is it going to happen again?'
'You've got a bloody hard head,' said Magrat, pulling herself to her feet.
'Modesty forbids me to comment,' said the Fool, and then remembered himself and added, quickly, 'Prithee.'
They stared at one another again, their minds racing.
Magrat thought: Nanny said look at him properly. I'm looking at him. He just looks the same. A sad thin little man in a ridiculous jester's outfit, he's practically a hunchback.
Then, in the same way that a few random bulges in a cloud can suddenly become a galleon or a whale in the eye of the beholder, Magrat realised that the Fool was not a little man. He was at least of average height, but he made himself small, by hunching his shoulders, bandying his legs and walking in a half-crouch that made him appear as though he was capering on the spot.
I wonder what else Gytha Ogg noticed? she thought, intrigued.
He rubbed his arm and gave her a lopsided grin.
'I suppose you haven't got any idea where we are?' he said.
'Witches never get lost,' said Magrat firmly. 'Although they can become temporarily mislaid. Lancre's over that way, I think. I've got to find a hill, if you'll excuse me.'
'To see where you are?'
'To see when, I think. There's a lot of magic going on tonight.'
'Is there? Then I think I'll accompany you,' the Fool added chivalrously, after peering cautiously into the tree-haunted gloom that apparently lay between him and his flagstones. 'I wouldn't want anything to happen to you.'
Granny lay low over the broomstick as it plunged through the trackless chasms of the mountains, leaning from side to side in the nope that this might have some effect on the steering which seemed, strangely, to be getting worse. Falling snow behind her was whipped and spiralled into odd shapes by the wind of her passage. Rearing waves of crusted snow, poised all winter over the glacial valleys, trembled and then began the long, silent fall. Her flight was punctuated by the occasional boom of an avalanche.
She looked down at a landscape of sudden death and jagged beauty, and knew it was looking back at her, as a dozing man may watch a mosquito. She wondered if it realised what she was doing. She wondered if it'd make her fall any softer, and mentally scolded herself for such softness. No, the land wasn't like that. It didn't bargain. The land gave hard, and took hard. A dog always bit deepest on the veterinary hand.
And then she was through, vaulting so low over the last peak that one of her boots filled with snow, and barrelling down towards the lowlands.
The mist, never far away in the mountains, was back again, but this time it was making a fight of it and had become a thick, silver sea in front of her. She groaned.
Somewhere in the middle of it Nanny Ogg floated, taking the occasional pull from a hip flask as a preventative against the chill.
And thus it was that Granny, her hat and iron-grey hair dripping with moisture, her boots shedding lumps of ice, heard the distant and muffled sound of a voice enthusiastically explaining to the invisible sky that the hedgehog had less to worry over than just about any other mammal. Like a hawk that has spotted something small and fluffy in the grass, like a wandering interstellar flu germ that has just seen a nice blue planet drifting by, Granny turned the stick and plunged down through the choking billows.
'Come on!' she screamed, drunk with speed and exhilaration, and the sound from five hundred feet overhead put a passing wolf severely off its supper. 'This minute, Gytha Ogg!'
Nanny Ogg caught her hand with considerable reluctance and the pair of broomsticks swept up again and into the clear, starlit sky.
The Disc, as always, gave the impression that the Creator has designed it specifically to be looked at from above. Streamers of cloud in white and silver stretched away to the rim, stirred into thousand-mile swirls by the turning of the world. Behind the speeding brooms the sullen roof of the fog was dragged up into a curling tunnel of white vapour, so that the watching gods – and they were certainly watching – could see the terrible flight as a furrow in the sky.
A thousand feet and rising fast into the frosty air, the two witches were bickering again.
'It was a bloody stupid idea,' moaned Nanny. 'I never liked heights.'
'Did you bring something to drink?'
'Certainly. You said.'
'Well?'
'I drank it, didn't I,' said Nanny. 'Sitting around up there at my age. Our Jason would have a fit.'
Granny gritted her teeth. 'Well, let's have the power,' she said. 'I'm running out of up. Amazing how—'
Granny's voice ended in a scream as; without any warning at all, her broomstick pinwheeled sharply across the clouds and dropped from sight.