Nobby blew his nose, loudly.
It was echoed by a hammering on the door. Colon jerked his head. Carrot got up and opened it.
A couple of members of the palace guard were waiting with arrogant impatience. They stepped back when they saw Carrot, who had to bend a bit to see under the lintel; bad news like Carrot travels fast.
“We've brung you a proclamation,” said one of them. “You've got to-”
“What's all that fresh paint on your breastplate?” said Carrot politely. Nobby and the sergeant peered around him.
“It's a dragon,” said the younger of the guards.
“The dragon,” corrected his superior.
“ 'Ere, I know you,” said Nobby. 'You're Skully Maltoon. Used to live in Mincing Street. Your mum made cough sweets, din't she, and fell in the mixture and died. I never have a cough sweet but I think of your mum."
“Hallo, Nobby,” said the guard, without enthusiasm.
“I bet your old mum'd be proud of you, you with a dragon on your vest,” said Nobby conversationally. The guard gave him a look made of hatred and embarrassment.
“And new plumes on your hat, too,” Nobby added sweetly.
“This here is a proclamation what you are commanded to read,” said the guard loudly. “And post up on street corners also. By order.”
“Whose?” said Nobby.
Sergeant Colon grabbed the scroll in one ham-like fist.
“Where As,” he read slowly, tracing the lettering with a hesitant finger, “It hathe Pleas-Sed the Der-Rer-Aa-Ger-the dragon, Ker-Ii-king of kings and Aa-Ber-Ess-Uh-Ler-” sweat beaded on the broad pink cliff of his forehead-“absolute, that is, Rer-Uh-Ler-Eh-Rer, ruler of-”
He lapsed into the tortured silence of academia, his fingertip jerking slowly down the parchment.
“No,” he said at last. “That's not right, is it? It's not going to eat someone?”
“Consume,” said the older guard.
ragon gave him a long, blank stare.
“In fact,” said Wonse, trying to keep the trembling out of his voice, “before too long, if someone comes along and tells them that a dragon king is a bad idea, they'll kill him themselves.”
The dragon blinked.
For the first time Wonse could remember, it seemed uncertain.
“I know people, you see,” said Wonse, simply.
The dragon continued to pin him with its gaze.
If you are lying ... it thought, eventually.
“You know I can't. Not to you.”
And they really act like this?
“Oh, yes. All the time. It's a basic human trait.”
Wonse knew the dragon could read at least the upper levels of his mind. They resonated in terrible harmony. And he could see the mighty thoughts behind the eyes in front of him.
The dragon was horrified.