'Just put it over there,' he said absently.
'It's me, Mr Silverfish,' said Victor.
Silverfish turned around and peered vaguely at him, as if it was Victor's fault that his name meant nothing.
'Yes?'
'I've come because of that job,' said Victor. 'You know?'
'What job? What should I know?' said Silverfish. 'How the hell did you get in here?'
'I broke into moving pictures,' said Victor. 'But it's nothing that a hammer and a few nails won't put right.'
Panic bloomed on Silverfish's face. Victor pulled out the card and waved it in what he hoped was a reassuring way.
'In Ankh-Morpork?' he said. 'A couple of nights ago? You were being menaced?'
Realization dawned. 'Oh, yes,' said Silverfish faintly. 'And you were the lad who was of some help.'
'And you said to come and see you if I wanted to move pictures,' said Victor. 'I didn't, then, but I do now.' He gave Silverfish a bright smile.
But he thought: he's going to try and wriggle out of it. He's regretting the offer. He's going to send me back to the queue.
'Well, of course,' said Silverfish, 'a lot of very talented people want to be in moving pictures. We're going to have sound any day now. I mean, are you a carpenter? Any alchemical experience? Have you ever trained imps? Any good with your hands at all?'
'No,' Victor admitted.
'Can you sing?'
'A bit. In the bath. But not very well,' Victor conceded.
'Can you dance?'
'No.'
'Swords? Do you know how to handle a sword?'
'A little,' said Victor. He'd used one sometimes in the gym. He'd never in fact fought an opponent, since wizards generally abhor exercise and the only other University resident who ever entered the place was the Librarian, and then only to use the ropes and rings. But Victor had practised an energetic and idiosyncratic technique in front of the mirror, and the mirror had never beaten him yet.
'I see,' said Silverfish gloomily. 'Can't sing. Can't dance. Can handle a sword a little.'
'But I have saved your life twice,' said Victor.
'Twice?' snapped Silverfish.
'Yes,' said Victor. He took a deep breath. This was going to be risky. 'Then,' he said, 'and now.'
There was a long pause.
Then Silverfish said, 'I really don't think there's any call for that.'
'I'm sorry, Mr Silverfish,' Victor pleaded. 'I'm really not that kind of person but you did say and I've walked all this way and I haven't got any money and I'm hungry and I'll do anything you've got. Anything at all. Please.'
Silverfish looked at him doubtfully.
'Even acting?' he said.
'Pardon?'