“Oh, don’t think like that. Guru Ram isn’t after my money.”
“Of course he’s not after your money! You already gave it all to him.” I close my eyes, rub the bridge of my nose and wish for two Tylenol. Or death. At this point, I’m not exactly fussy. “Mom, I need you to come home.”
“I can’t, honey. Not if I’m about to have a breakthrough.”
“Yeah, well I’m about to have a breakdown, so…”
She laughs, and I swear it’s like nails scraping down a chalkboard. “This is important, Sage.”
Which, roughly translates into the fact that I’m not important. Then again, that’s not exactly a newsflash. “Mom, the studio is important, too. You’ve worked so hard for it and I’m trying to hold it together, but—”
“Oh, Sage, you can handle it. You’re good at everything, especially when it comes to running a business. I’m sure you’re doing a much better job than I could ever do.”
I was. But that was before she stole the business’s entire capital out from under me. “Mom—”
“I have to go, darling. It’s time for kundalini.”
“Wait, we still need to—” I start, but she’s already gone. Damn it.
I toss my phone onto the nearest surface then sink to the floor and try to focus on breathing. Just breathing. I can feel the beginning of a panic attack coming on, but if I can just relax—just breathe—I can stave it off.
I haven’t had one in nearly two years, since right before I graduated from college, but all it takes is one of my mom’s signature disasters and here I am, right back where I used to be. Damn it.
My mind is racing as I try to figure out what the hell I’m supposed to do here. I’m going to have to pay the employees, going to have to pay the bills. Which means I’m going to have to use the money I’ve spent so long saving to do it.
But even that’s just a stopgap measure. We’ve got big bills coming up in the next couple of months—insurance, trainings, just to name a few. I can’t cover all of it. I could try applying for a short-term loan, but what am I supposed to tell the bank when they ask where the studio’s capital has gone? That my mom ran off to India and gave it to some guru who’s helping her to reach the next spiritual plane? I’ll be laughed out of the building.
As I rest my head on my knees and continue with the breathing exercises my therapist taught me years ago, it occurs to me that for once, my mother is right. I was looking for something to get my mind off Shawn and what happened in the bar tonight, and for once, the universe delivered in a big, big way.
Fuck. My. Life.
Chapter 6
Shawn
“So, how’s your back doing?” Hunter asks as we work out in his new home gym. He’s first-string quarterback for the Lightning and one of my closest friends, but the look he’s giving me makes me want to smash my fist into his face.
Then again, I’ve been having that feeling a lot lately. “Why the fuck does everyone keep asking me that?” I demand, adding another ten pounds to both sides of the bench press bar.
“Maybe because you’ve currently got the disposition of a cornered cobra,” answers Tanner, left tackle and all-around pain in the ass. “And you only ever get that way when you’re in pain, sooooo…”
“Sooooo?” I mock as I lay back down on the bench.
“So we figure it’s your back,” Hunter finishes for him.
“My back is fine,” I tell them, lifting the bar off the supports. As I do, the back in question twinges, but I ignore it. I’ve played pro football for a decade, and college ball before that. It’d be weird if my back didn’t twinge every once in a while. The fact that it never happened before my last trip to Acapulco is nobody’s business but mine.
I lower the bar to my chest, then raise it again as Tanner spots me. Lower, then raise. After all, it’s not like it’s affecting my performance. I’m lifting as much as I ever have, and I can still run just fine. I’m no Clay Bruce, but I can more than hold my own on the field.
“Dude, I’m the one throwing the ball to you. You think I can’t see when you hesitate?”
Hunter’s fishing and we both know it. I never hesitate. Never have, never will—on or off the field. It’s one of Coach’s big problems with me, in fact.
“Bite me,” I grind out as I do an
other rep.
“As if,” Tanner snorts. “The way you get around, it’d be a miracle if I didn’t catch something.”