Oblivious to his groping of my tit, he mutters, “What are you bitching about now?”
He’s trashed and more belligerent than when he used to sleep over at our house in high school. Ethan was never mean to me when we were younger. Our relationship was special, something I had treasured. I have to constantly remind myself that he’s not the same person.
I grab hold of the divider, which separates the living room from the kitchen, to help Ethan over to the couch without knocking the pictures from the wall.
How much did these idiots drink? Ethan and Will were always big partiers, but ever since Will was selected by the Flyers, he’s cut down his drinking. At least he did until Ethan was traded to the team. Apparently, he’s a bad influence on my brother.
We almost take out the flat-screen television on top of the oak chest my parents had given me when they moved. Ethan’s body is like dead weight in my arms. Somehow, I manage to get him over to the sofa without falling onto the floor, with my arm around his back and his weight pushing down on me. But not without him taking me with him.
I’m about to dump him on the cushions when his foot tangles with mine, tripping me in the process. We fall sideways onto a stack of pillows. He’s two hundred twenty pounds of solid muscle, toned to perfection, and draped over me like a heavy blanket. The heat from his body makes me crave the closeness. I’m all too aware of how my body responds to him.
My nipples harden from his breath on my neck and the connection we share. I missed Ethan when he was in Boston, but that man is long gone. In place of the boy I fell in love with, I got a hockey star and an arrogant one at that.
Ethan nestles his face against my neck, his lips grazing my skin. His kisses send chills down my spine. Is he too drunk to realize he’s kissing me? Ugh. And why do I like it so much? Because I’ve wanted him to kiss me for over ten years. I can’t go from hating to liking Ethan all over again. That ship has sailed.
Ethan perks up, taking in his surroundings with one eye open. As if we’re still kids, I place my hand on his knee. Why does everything feel so natural with Ethan? I shake the thought from my head, but the nagging in the back of my mind won’t go away. My feelings for Ethan never dissipated. The love I once felt mostly turned to hate, and on occasion, those emotions turn to lust. And I despise myself for thinking of Ethan this way.
He sensually runs his calloused fingers down my forearm, causing the tiny hairs to stand at attention. Even in his drunken state, Ethan knows exactly what he’s doing. Everywhere our skin meets leaves a trail of fire in its wake. I want to throw him off me, but instead, I allow him to massage me. We don’t speak or make eye contact.
“Your skin is soft like a baby,” he whispers. “I could touch you all night, my little lamb.”
You haven’t called me that in years.
I raise a curious eyebrow. My little lamb. My three favorite words in the English language.
“You’re only saying that because you’re drunk. Don’t think I’ll forget about you bailing on me.”
He sighs and leans back against the couch pillow, still rubbing my skin. “You wouldn’t understand. It’s not what you think. No matter how many times I tell you that, you don’t believe me.”
“Then tell me why you left?”
He moves his hand to the sofa, and I already miss his touch. “Forget it! Just go to bed, Mia.”
Ethan pulls his shirt over his head and throws it on the floor. I lick my lips at the sight of his muscular chest and abs that make me want to bounce quarters off them.
He rolls onto his back and looks up at me. “You know, it wouldn’t kill you to have a little fun every once in a while. Stop being such a pain in my ass.”
“I wish I could, Ethan, but I have to work hard if I want to get anywhere. I’m not as naturally gifted and perfect as you.”
He snorts at my comment. “I’m not perfect, far from it. Stop pretending like you know shit about me…” His voice sounds sad before he trails off. “No one does. Not anymore, anyway.”
I suck in a deep breath and blow it out, frustrated and somewhat upset by our exchange. “You have one chance. That’s it. Continue to act like a jerk and you’ll have to find another place to crash. I don’t even know why either of you would want to stay with me when you can both afford to sleep in a hotel. I’m sure your insurance policy will pay for it.”
He sighs but doesn’t respond, hopefully letting it sink in, though I’m sure he’s too drunk to absorb anything I’m saying.
After a long, awkward pause, Ethan clutches my waist and pulls me to his chest. I attempt to break free from his grasp, but my desire to fight him only causes him to tug harder at my tank. He turns me so that half of my body is on top of his.
“What are you doing, Ethan?”
With my head next to his, our mouths only inches apart, his glassy green eyes meet mine. I wish I could find the courage to pull away from him. He makes me weak. Being this close, I want to kiss Ethan and find some form of comfort in him even if it’s only for one kiss.
Ethan raises his fingers to my cheek and begins to cup my face with his big hand. “You’re beautiful, Mia,” he whispers, his voice low and sensual. “Not kissing you before I left is still one of my biggest regrets. And now… you hate me.”
I don’t respond to his comment because it’s probably for the best.
He props his head on a stack of pillows, his eyes slowly closing. “Stay with me. For the night.”
Ethan moves around to get comfortable, giving me some room. He’s in such good shape. There’s not an ounce of fat on him, making me feel self-conscious in my pajamas. Distracted by his abs, I stop for a second to take in the sight of him. I stare for far too long and have to remind myself not to gape at his pelvic muscle or think about what he must look like naked.