“And what might that be?”
“I am no longer the Mijai assigned to this case. My task now lies with defending the gates, rather than you.”
I frowned. “Even though I carry your child?”
“It is my duty, not my desire. Believe that.”
“Well, duty can fuck off. And so can the powers that be. I want you guarding me, and no one else.”
“It is not that easy —”
“It is that easy,” I bit back. “Or they can forget any fucking hope of me giving them the keys.”
He was silent, his gaze suddenly distant, distracted. After a moment, he said quietly, “The powers that be suggest withholding the keys from them would not be wise.”
My heart just about stopped. “They’re listening in to our conversation?”
“Of course. You are now Mijai to-be, so discussions of importance, such as this, will always be monitored.”
Celestial eavesdropping. Just what we needed. I shrugged, a casual movement that belied the tension riding me. “What’s the worst they can do? Kill me again?”
“It would bring you under their control more fully,” he said. “You will, after all, become Mijai after your next death.”
“Which means squat. It’s not like they can go all autocratic on my ass and force me to do their bidding, is it?” I hesitated, frowning suddenly. “Is it?”
“No, that is not their way. They can, however, make life rather unpleasant.”
My gaze dropped briefly to his scars. If they were a result of “unpleasantness,” then it definitely wasn’t something I wanted to face. But I wasn’t about to try to find the other keys without Azriel by my side, either.
“We started this together, we finish it together. End of story, Azriel.” I took a deep breath, then added resolutely, “And if they don’t like it, then hey, they can do their worst. As I told my dad this morning, I’ve been dead, and I’ve had all my future lives ripped away from me. There’s nothing much more they can do, except take you away from me. And that will only achieve the exact opposite of what they want.”
His expression went all distracted again. I waited – though I wouldn’t say patiently – and eventually he said, “They will accede to your wishes. However, they are less than happy.”
I snorted. “Like I really care.”
“You might when you become Mijai. They have long memories.”
“And we have a whole lot of shit to face and survive before we ever get to that point.” I hesitated. “If I die, I become Mijai. What happens if you die?”
“Reapers, like Aedh, are extremely long-lived, but we are not immortal. If I die, then I will become just another celestial star awaiting rebirth.”
“So reapers don’t move through heaven and hell gates like the rest of us?”
“No. We are energy, and we return to the cosmos that gave birth to us.”
Huh. “Then I guess you’d better make sure you don’t get dead, then.”
“That would be my plan also,” he said, voice solemn, but with a smile touching his lips. He gently tucked a stray hair behind my ears. “Tao returns, and you need to eat.”
Eating wasn’t what I wanted to be doing right now. Not when Azriel and the bed were in such close proximity. But the hours of life Mirri had left were steadily counting down, and it would be selfish to waste even ten minutes of it.
“Ten minutes,” Azriel commented, placing his hand against the base of my spine and ushering me toward the door, “is hardly enough time to warm up, let alone do justice to our lovemaking.”
“You obviously have never experienced the benefits of a quickie,” I said, amused.
“No, but if we survive this, then perhaps I might.”
“If we survive this, I’ll make sure that you do.”