“Life,” he said. “Humanity.”
I couldn’t help the contemptuous snort that escaped, even though I’d promised to curtail such reactions. “As I’ve said before, being born in a tube doesn’t make me any less human than those who created us or those who destroyed us.”
“Perhaps that is true of you and the little ghosts you’ve gathered around you, but can you honestly look me in the eye and say the same about those who were frontline fighters?”
“We’re all a product of our upbringing, Jonas. Those who were bred to be fighters were only doing as they were taught, and were both chemically and emotionally castrated. They didn’t know any different. If you want to blame anyone for what they did in the war, blame those who created and trained them.”
“You were trained to kill, weren’t you?”
“To seduce and then kill, yes, but as a lure, I had to be able to understand and respond to emotional cues. They couldn’t do to us what they did to the fighters.” I hesitated. “Why all the sudden interest?”
“I’m just trying to figure you out.”
How could I respond to a statement like that? No one, not in all the years I’d been alive, had ever made any attempt at knowing the person inside—the real me. Those who’d created us had never thought it necessary, and even Sal, who’d been my friend and the only adult I’d really been close to, had never truly known me. If he had, he wouldn’t have underestimated me the way he did in our final meeting.
I drank some coffee; it didn’t help ease either the sudden dryness in my throat or the erratic pounding of my pulse. “Why? We both know you’re only here because you need me to help rescue those kids.”
A somewhat wry smile touched his lips. “While that is totally true, it has nothing to do with my reasons for trying to unravel the conundrum you present.”
“And why would you even want to do that? Once those kids are rescued, we go our separate ways.” Either that or I’d be dead.
“Perhaps,” he agreed. “But in understanding you, I might also understand the reason why I am so attracted to someone I should logically hate with every inch of my being.”
So there it was: confirmation that I wasn’t reading him wrong. That he was indeed as attracted to me as I was to him. And I didn’t know whether to dance with joy or run as far and fast as I could from the man.
Because mutual attraction didn’t make him any less dangerous, even if that danger was now more emotional than physical.
Presuming, of course, I was capable of a deeper emotional connection. Having never been in the state of love, I really couldn’t say. But this thing between Jonas and me was already far different from anything I’d felt before, and we’d only just stopped snarling at each other.
“Attraction is a given, I’m afraid. I’m a lure, bred to be nigh on irresistible to cat shifters.” Once I would have added “when I chose to be,” but Jonas’s presence in my life had certainly knocked that notion on the head.
Amusement danced in the rich depths of his green eyes, even if little of it showed in his somewhat serious expression. “So lures capture attention by doing their utmost to avoid any admittance of attraction as well as all physical contact, however slight?”
“Well, no, but—”
“I am—was—a ranger,” he cut in. “We’re trained to read people—not just through what is said and done, but in the giveaway signs few are aware of. You have been fighting this every bit as much as I have.”
“And we both know why.”
He nodded. “Because neither of us trusted the other.”
“And still don’t, to some extent.”
“Given that you were bred to kill my kind, and I was trained to erase yours, that’s to be expected.”
“So what’s the point of bringing all this up, Jonas? It’s not going to change anything anytime soon, is it?”
His smile held an edge I didn’t quite understand. “Maybe not. But I learned the hard way that avoiding issues is never a good idea when you’re working closely with someone. Confronting them, and talking through them as a team, is always the most efficient method of problem-solving.”
“So is that what this is?” What I was? “A problem you need to solve?”
“Oh, I think this thing between us is probably a whole lot more than just a problem. But that is neither here nor there, given it is the female of our species who decides which males can or can’t court her.”
I couldn’t help my sudden grin. “You’ll have to excuse my amusement, but it’s hard to imagine you actually courting anyone.”
He raised an eyebrow again and leaned back in his chair. “I’ll have you know that it was a rare day when I didn’t wi
n a female’s favor.”