“I’m so sorry, Sloan,” she mutters with sadness in her eyes.
“No pity,” I remind her.
“Right. Keep going. I want to hear it all.”
“You met some of my friends at The Sixth Floor. Nothing about them is legal, if you get what I’m trying to tell you without actually saying it. They do whatever it takes to get by, and for years, I did whatever was necessary right alongside them. I had no way to pay for college, other than the scholarships I got because of my grades. We were poor, but I guess not poor enough according to the state for me to get a completely free ride. They had no idea my dad spent all of his money on beer, vodka, and sports betting. He loved wasting an entire paycheck on the Eagles, who never won a fucking game he bet on.”
“What kind of things did you have to do?”
“Whatever I had to do. The tuition bills kept coming in, and I wasn’t about to end up like my friends. We sold drugs, handled bets for the bookie who lived around the corner from us, and pretty much anything else we could do to survive. My friends had it much worse than me. Even though my dad was a drunk, I was lucky he wasn’t the abusive kind. Instead, he would zone out and forget I even existed. It worked well for both of us. Having such a shitty father made me want to do something with my life, no matter what I had to do to get it. I knew from an early age that I never wanted to be like my old man.”
“That’s incredible that you were able to overcome so much to get where you are today,” Ava says. “Doesn’t that make you even more nervous about someone finding out about us? You already risked so much in your life to make your dreams come true. A scandal with a resident could ruin your career.”
More annoyed with myself than anyone, I grunt in frustration. “I guess I keep telling myself that no one will find out and that we can continue this way forever. I’m sorry, Ava. That is my fault. As the interim Residency Program Director, I’m supposed to ensure everyone on my staff is prepared to become a surgeon. Your training should have come first, and instead, I put my needs above yours. We need to change things when we get back to work. From now on, you will learn from me, instead of us sneaking around whenever we get the chance.”
“I understand, but you didn’t answer my question,” she says. “Aren’t you afraid to have everything you worked so hard to achieve disappear in the blink of an eye because of our inappropriate relationship?”
“The only thing inappropriate is the hospital’s stupid guidelines. Let me deal with them. I won’t lose my license to practice medicine over sleeping with an intern. We are both consenting adults. You are not receiving any preferential treatment from me, though I doubt some of your fellow interns will see it that way. I choose you because you are the best. Only the best is good enough for my patients. It has nothing to do with us.”
“It could damage your reputation if people were to find out. Having a bad rep in this business would be just as detrimental to your career.”
The waitress breaks up our conversation when she asks us what we want to order. I take charge and order chicken Parmesan, served family-style, for us along with two Caesar salads.
“Enough about me.” I pick up my glass and take a sip of wine. “This night is supposed to be about us, and this conversation is depressing. Let’s worry about the hospital when we cross that bridge. No matter what happens, you let me do the talking. I have a lot of pull at Penn Gen.”
“I will,” she promises. “And thank you for sharing so much about your past with me, Sloan. I feel like I understand you better already.”
The corners of my mouth turn up into a smile. “It feels good to talk to someone for a change. I’m so used to holding all of it inside.”
“You can always talk to me, Sloan.”
I kiss her on the forehead, and she stirs in my arms, looking up at me with a bright smile.
“And to think we never would have seen each other again if you weren’t my boss.” She tilts her head to the side and rests her cheek against my chest.
“Fate, I guess.”
“I’m glad I was the exception to your rule. Things could have gotten super awkward if you were a dick about it.”
I grab her hand and then bend down to kiss her neck, pinning her in place so that I can torture her, continuing to leave kisses along her skin.
“Keep that up, and you will have to meet me in the bathroom for a pre-dinner quickie,” she says, laughing.
“If that’s what you want,” I whisper against her neck, “I can make that a reality. Just say the word.”
She sucks in a deep breath when I place her hand on my erection and I slip my other hand beneath her skirt to find that her panties are so fucking wet. I consider bending her over the sink in the bathroom, or fucking her against the wall, like we did at Starbucks. But things are different now that Ava is my girlfriend.
We’re touching each other over our clothes when the waitress comes back with our salad, interrupting our under-the-table action. She clears her throat to announce her presence and sets the plates in front of us. Embarrassed, her face breaking out in red blotches, Ava avoids eye contact with the waitress and lifts her fork in her hand.
“I am starved.” I dig into my salad, staring at Ava the entire time. “But I’d much rather eat something else.”
She smiles so wide it reaches up to her bright blue eyes. “Let’s save that for dessert.”
I return her smile and shove the lettuce into my mouth, thinking about her lips and what I want to do with them, as I eat my food.
Chapter Nineteen
AVA