Straight Up Love (Boys of Jackson Harbor 2) - Page 58

And I’m so caught up in the feeling of Jake’s lips on mine and the hot pull of desire in my belly that it takes me a beat to realize who he’s even talking about.

Jake

I unlock the front door of Jackson Brews and pull it open for Molly. “You’re early.”

She grins as she steps inside. “I wanted a chance to talk to you before Brayden joined us.”

I tense, but I suppose this was unavoidable. If I was enough of an idiot to get drunk and screw Molly five years ago, I have to be willing to talk about it now—and be willing to own up to the mistake to Ava. It feels more important than I want it to, but yesterday she let me kiss her in front of her ex-husband and a couple dozen people who were a part of her married life. I don’t know if it felt significant to her, but the significance of the moment wasn’t lost on me.

“Yeah, I need to talk to you too.” I wave to one of the tables and shut and lock the door behind her. The bar won’t open to the public for two hours, so Brayden and I will have plenty of time to give Molly the rundown on what we’d need in a regional sales rep.

Molly puts her purse down on one chair and pulls out another to sit. “I want to talk about you and Ava,” she says.

“If you’re going to give the ‘hurt my sister and die’ speech, you should know Colton already beat you to it.” I rub my shoulder, still a little sore from where his fist

connected when he saw me at the bar last night. That whole conversation would have gone a lot better if I could have been honest with him instead of rolling with the whole “trying to help my best friend get pregnant” story. But the truth? That I want Ava to give us a chance? That I’m going all in for one last shot at making her love me back? I kept that story to myself. I don’t want Ava knowing what this is about for me. Not yet. I can’t risk her freaking out.

“What exactly is going on between you two?” Molly asks.

“It’s complicated.”

“Complicated because you’re still in love with her and she still doesn’t feel the same about you, or complicated because you’re going to let her use you for a baby?”

Her words are a punch to the gut, and I wince. “Jesus. Don’t say it like that. It’s not like I don’t know what I’m getting myself into here.”

She turns to look out the window. The street outside is quiet, with only a few people walking by on their way to work or their Monday morning yoga class down the block. “Has anyone told you this is a terrible idea?”

Colton, Levi, Carter, Ellie—pretty much everyone who knows what I offered Ava has taken a moment to inform me that I’m a fucking idiot. “It’s come up a time or two.”

She keeps her eyes on the window. A woman walks past carrying a rolled-up yoga mat. “Good.”

I feel like a jerk. The night we hooked up, Molly admitted she’d had feelings for me for a long time, but I never would have guessed that she’d been holding on to those feelings since. “Is this about us?” I ask. “Because, Moll, we haven’t seen each other in almost five years.”

She tugs on a lock of her hair. “I know.”

“I’m really sorry I let that happen. I should have never—”

“Don’t. Please. I don’t want your regrets.” She shakes her head and lowers her voice. “Not when I have none of my own.”

I could offer excuses. Platitudes. Bullshit. But that all feels wrong and insulting. “This thing with Ava . . . You’re right. I’m still in love with her. Maybe I’m an idiot, but I’m taking a chance to see if maybe, if she lets herself, she can feel something in return.”

“What are you going to do if it works?”

“I’m going to fucking rejoice.”

She shakes her head. “I don’t mean if your plan works. I don’t mean what happens if you end up together. I mean what happens if you don’t end up together, but you have a baby. Are you just going to carry on with your life knowing you have a kid out there? Pretend you aren’t a father?”

“I would never walk away from my child.” I swallow. I’ve kissed Ava a couple of times and made some promises, but she hasn’t pushed me about when we’re going to follow through. I imagine that’s because she’s nervous about it. I am too. Nervous that she might only want the child I offered. Nervous that she might feel like I’ve changed the terms of our deal when she finds out this all comes back to how I feel about her. “I’m taking it slow, and she’s okay with that. So I’m hoping things will shift between us as we move forward, and she’ll . . .”

Molly smiles softly. “You’re hoping she’ll catch feelings?”

“Something like that.”

She traces an invisible figure eight on the wooden tabletop. “I guess this is a bad time to tell you I’ve never forgotten about you. I know what happened between us might not have seemed like a big deal to you. Everyone knows Molly McKinley’s an easy lay—”

“I never said that.”

She shrugs. “Maybe you didn’t, but enough people did. I just wanted you to know you weren’t just a warm body on a lonely night. You’ve always been special to me.”

Tags: Lexi Ryan Boys of Jackson Harbor Romance
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