“It’s just emotional castration. No worries.”
She rolls her eyes. “And anyway, don’t you want to marry some hot young thing who can give you wild sex every night?”
“Yeah. Definitely.” Wild sex with Ava sounds amazing to me. Too bad she’s not talking about herself.
“I should get home. I have a thousand things to do before my shift tonight.”
“Including research on artificial insemination?”
She nods, then studies my face. “Are you going to be okay with this? I know there are people who don’t approve of a woman starting a family on her own, but—”
“Since when have I ever not been right by your side when you needed me? This won’t be any different.” Except it will. Because somehow, her decision to start a family on her own feels like the final nail in the coffin of Ava-and-Jake. Ever since her divorce, I’ve been holding on, waiting for her to see me differently, to give me a chance. But now . . .
I release her hand and stand. “Want me to make you some bacon and eggs? Salt is good for the hangover.”
She lies back down instead of getting up like she said she was going to. “Yes, please.”
I pinch her nose and head to the kitchen.
“Jake?” she calls when my feet hit the hallway.
I stop and turn, hope wobbling around in my chest like a newborn foal. “Yeah?”
“Would you put some cheese in my eggs?”
I take a deep breath, as if that might help me steady myself after this emotional rollercoaster of a morning. “Anything for you, Av.”
Ava
“Feel better?” Jake asks as I push away my plate.
“I do.” Jake was right. My hangover was nothing a little salty breakfast couldn’t fix, and by the time I was halfway through my food, I felt like a new woman. It helps that he’s the best chef I’ve ever met. I lean back in my chair and put my hand on my full belly. “Thank you. That was so good.”
He turns his wrist to look at his watch, and I realize in a sudden panic that it’s Saturday. “Jake! Your mom and Shay are coming home from Grand Rapids today! You wanted to be there, didn’t you?”
He shrugs. “It’s no big deal. I texted Shay and told her I’d be late.”
My shoulders sag. I’m the worst friend ever. “You stayed here and cooked the hungover girl breakfast while your family is rallying together around your sick mother.”
“It’s not like we’re having a party,” he says, amusement quirking his lips. “If I don’t make it over today, I’ll see them all at brunch tomorrow.” His nonchalance doesn’t fool me. Family is everything to Jake, and I know he’d have been at his childhood home already if he hadn’t been tending to me.
“How’s your mom doing?” I ask.
He stiffens. “She’s tired, but that’s to be expected. Yesterday was her last treatment in this round of chemo, so she’ll get a break. The nausea was intense there at the end, and I’ve never seen her so exhausted . . .” He trails off, and I know he’s not just thinking of his mom. He’s thinking of his dad, who died of cancer five years ago.
The news of Kathleen’s cancer was a blow to the whole family. She even tried keeping her diagnosis a secret and getting her treatments in Germany so her children wouldn’t have to watch another parent die.
“When will you know if it worked?”
“Shay said they scheduled the PET scan for June. That’ll show them the cell activity to see if the cancer is active or in remission. We’re all optimistic.”
Optimistic. But his smile is unsteady, and he avoids my gaze as he says it. That isn’t the face of optimistic Jake. That’s the face of a man who’s bracing himself for the worst because he’s been there before, and I ache for him. It’s going to be a long couple of months while they wait for that test.
When he lost his father five years ago, I was caught up in planning a wedding and starting my life with Harrison, but I still saw enough to know they were the worst days of his life. The idea of losing Kathleen guts me—she’s a second mother to me—but even worse is the idea of seeing Jake leveled by grief for a second time.
“I’ll get out of your way,” I say, clearing my plate. “You can still go visit.”
“No, don’t rush.”