“You feel so damn good,” I whisper into her ear. Between our bodies, I cup her breast and squeeze gently, loving the arch of her neck and the flush in her cheeks. “So good.”
When her body tightens around me and her soft moans turn to desperate pants, I cover her mouth with mine and kiss her with everything I’m feeling. It’s too much to keep this inside, and I focus on this moment: Ava naked and falling apart in my arms, her vulnerability making me even more aware of mine. I love her, and losing her would destroy me. I can’t. I won’t.
“You’re mine,” I say, and there’s an edge to my words that’s sharper than my building need. Mine.
She softens under me. “Yes. Yours.”
I take her words as the promise I need them to be and let myself go, closing my eyes and relishing the feel of skin on skin as I release.
Jake
The bedroom ceiling fan clicks overhead, passing cool air over our sweaty limbs and providing a steady rhythm to our lazy Saturday. We gave up on joining my family down at the lake and retreated to my bedroom instead. I sent Shay a text saying we decided to spend the day alone, and she replied, Remember to hydrate.
Ava traces the ink across my left pec, a relaxed and satisfied sigh streaming from her lips. We have no interest in letting each other go, so we’re enjoying the empty cabin while we can.
“I love you,” she whispers.
I press a kiss to the top of her head. “I love you too.”
“I still can’t quite believe this is real.” She hoists herself up onto one elbow and looks down at me, her dark hair falling in a curtain around her face.
“Why did you pretend you didn’t know?” I ask. My voice is rough, my stomach in a knot at the memory of putting myself out there and being pushed away. I wanted to ask her a lot of times, but the truth is, she saved our friendship by pretending the afternoon I first kissed her never happened.
I was always too grateful I didn’t lose her to call her on it.
“What do you mean?” She lowers her head back down to the pillow, and I roll to my side so we’re face to face, our bodies only inches apart, our fingers intertwined as we hold hands between our chests.
“You act like I never told you how I feel.” I study her. “I admitted I was in love with you almost five years ago, and you . . .” I swallow, not wanting to label the obvious rejection.
Her eyes fill with tears, but she blinks them away. “You were just trying to keep me from making a bad decision. You shouldn’t have done it, but I understood and let it go. I didn’t want to let the fight ruin our friendship.”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“I was angry with you for lying like that. I spent a few days contemplating calling off my wedding because of what you said. Then Harrison told me he confronted you. He said you told him you were only trying to stop me from marrying him. That I was like a sister to you.”
The memory falls like a rock into my stomach. Harrison was so pissed when he found out I’d kissed Ava. He didn’t want me in her life. And honestly, at first, I didn’t think I wanted to be. When I left her apartment after telling her I loved her, I thought that if she wouldn’t be mine, I didn’t want her in my life at all. It hurt too damn much. But by the time Harrison showed up at my bar, pissed at me for kissing his girl, I’d decided I needed to do whatever was necessary to hold on to my best friend. Including lying to Harrison about my feelings for Ava and pretending my night with Molly never happened.
“I lied to him, Ava.” I shake my head. “I told him what he needed to hear so you and I could keep being friends. The day I kissed you in your apartment, I meant every word I said.” I pause for a beat and close my eyes as the rest of her words sink in. She almost called off her wedding? For me?
“Things could have been so different.” A tear slips from her eye and begins its slow path over the bridge of her nose.
I release her hand so I can wipe it away. “Maybe. Or maybe you would have married him anyway.”
“I loved him. I didn’t want to lose either one of you. I didn’t think you saw me that way.”
“Even though I kissed you?” I ask, my voice rough.
“After having feelings for you for years, what you told Harrison was easier to believe than what you told me.”
“I don’t even know how long I’ve been in love with you,” I say. “I don’t know that I ever wasn’t. But I didn’t understand what I felt until you started dating Harrison. And when I realized how I felt about you, I was scared. I wasted so much time trying to get over you, and by the time I told you, it was too late.”
“Then I married him,” she says. “You came to my wedding, danced at my wedding, and told me you were happy for me. You went house hunting with me and helped me choose the home where I was supposed to grow old with another man.”
“I was prepared to do whatever I needed to keep your friendship, but I’ve always wanted more, Ava. Always.” I roll on top of her and hold her hands in mine over her head.
“You have me now,” she says. “For as long as you want me.”
I crush my mouth to hers before she can say more. I kiss her deeply before I can remember those words that threaten her promise.