The Ruthless Gentleman - Page 71

Shit. I should have prepared better for this, worked up arguments. I needed to convince her that . . . What? We were meant to date? Fuck? What was I offering her?

“We slept together. That’s all,” she said. “I’m not trying to make more of this—”

I’d had enough of the distance between us. I caged her against the wall, my hands braced on either side of her head.

Her gaze shot up to meet mine and then hit the floor.

“Look at me,” I growled.

She lifted her face and focused on my jaw.

“Yes, we slept together but don’t dismiss last night as if it’s something that happens to you a lot. You know it was . . .” I clenched my teeth, remembering how she’d felt around my cock, how her hair had slithered over her body like water—how we’d connected, mind, body and soul. “It wasn’t a one-night stand.”

Not only was Avery the only woman I’d known I’d want to fuck more than once before I’d touched her, she was the only woman I’d thought about after I’d come. She was the only one I’d had to convince to come to my bed and the only one I wanted there again.

Her gaze darted to my mouth, then up to meet my eyes and back down again. “It can’t be anything else. I need this job. You know that.”

“You’re not going to lose this job.” Fuck, I had no right to make promises I couldn’t keep. “Not if Skylar doesn’t say anything. We’ll be more careful. I’ll be more careful.” Last night we’d existed in some kind of suspended space and time, and I’d been lazy and selfish thinking that could continue back on the yacht.

“I can’t risk my brother’s medical bills for some holiday romance with you just because you’re bored.”

Pushing my hips against hers, I pinned her to the wall and cupped her face in my hands. “I didn’t fuck you because I was bored. I fucked you because I couldn’t help myself. This isn’t a holiday romance.” I wasn’t romantic and I wasn’t on holiday. But more than that, what was between us wasn’t fleeting.

“Of course it is.” She kicked her leg back in frustration, her heel connecting with the wall.

It took all my self-control not to close the space between us and kiss her, but I held back, determined to prove this wasn’t all about lust. “It’s more than that for me.” I didn’t know what was happening between us. I wanted her to understand that what I felt wasn’t casual.

“Last night we weren’t on the yacht and it was easier for me to pretend the rules didn’t apply. Today, it’s different. You’re my guest. I’m a stewardess. That’s how it should stay.”

“I won’t believe you if say you don’t feel this pull between us,” I whispered.

“Of course I feel it, but that doesn’t mean it’s right. It doesn’t mean I can give in to it again.”

I stepped back from her, wanting her to understand how serious I was. I didn’t want her to do something that would cause her pain, but she should know she wasn’t just a convenient fuck for me. I leaned against the desk. “I know I look like I’m being a selfish bastard. I know I have nothing to lose whereas you have put your career on the line. But I can’t let you walk out of here without telling you how I feel.” She deserved my honesty. “I need you to know that I’ve never had a night like last night. I’ve never been on the phone to lawyers about any deal, let alone the deal of my career, and found my mind so full of a woman I have no room for anything else.” I was usually laser focused and especially at times when I was under pressure, but Avery had everything upside down. “You make me want to blow off work and spend all night talking about everything you ever did before I met you. I want to understand what makes you happy, what makes you sad, what makes you angry.” I had an ego to match any man’s, but I’d never before believed that a woman existed just for me. That was how I felt about Avery Walker—she was here for me, made for me, created for me. “I’ve never felt so proud to know someone. And I’ve never felt so fucking lucky that that woman wanted me. I want to scoop you up and bolt off this yacht and go get lost somewhere where it’s just you and me until the end of time.” It was as if my heart was exploding and I was finally able to find words for what I was feeling. “The thought that we might be over just doesn’t make sense to me. What’s between us feels like it will last forever, like it’s timeless.”

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