I shut off the call and headed back to the office. I had a job to do. A daughter to provide for. I wasn’t going to waste time thinking about my past. I was going to focus on my future.
Twenty-Five
Autumn
Hollie and I sat at a table that looked like something out of a magazine—glinting flatware, cream orchid head in a tiny vase, and a crisp white linen tablecloth. I bet burgers weren’t on the menu here. We were by the window and could see the Thames peeking through the bright green leaves of the trees. Even now I was constantly surprised at the amount of green in London—far more than I’d been expecting. I was forever stumbling on a square or a park I’d never heard of and no one had ever mentioned, and I loved to explore.
“How did you talk Dexter into bringing me here today? Doesn’t he want to taste all the food for the wedding?” I asked as I glanced around, trying to take everything in from the deep pile carpets to the ornate gold and frosted glass light fixtures over the bar.
“I guess he’s used to this kind of thing. Going to lunch at the Savoy is no big deal to him.”
I could have lunch at the Savoy every day for the rest of my life and I still wouldn’t get used to it. “But it’s his wedding.”
I was pretty sure I’d be able to be a wedding organizer by the time Hollie and Dexter were married. I’d been happy to discuss every detail with Hollie and support her in her choices so she didn’t feel guilty or awkward. The money, the glamour, and the people she now mixed with changed the rules for her, and I knew it still made her a little uncomfortable. Even I found it intimidating at times and I wasn’t living with it every day. But, as always, if we did things together, nothing was unsurmountable.
The waitress poured two glasses of champagne and Hollie and I clinked as if champagne at lunchtime was just one of those things that the Lumen sisters did.
“He saw the menu and said he liked the sound of everything. And he’s not coming back from Dubai until this afternoon.”
I took the cream card from the center of the table and scanned down the list of food. The bits I recognized sounded amazing. The more I ate at these kinds of restaurants, the more I realized that I liked most things. “I’m happy to be his stand-in. I feel like I’m enjoying Dexter’s lifestyle on his behalf, which is fine by me. Do you feel like you’re missing out doing this stuff with him?”
“Not really. He’s busy. I’m busy. The wedding is no big deal, or so I keep telling myself. If it makes you feel better, he’s figuring out the wine by himself and he came to a dress fitting last week.”
“He saw your dress?” I asked.
“He has a great eye for design, and I want him to like whatever I wear.” She shrugged. “You think that’s a problem? It’s only a small wedding. It’s not like we’re following all the traditions.”
“I think you should make your own traditions and it’s true, he has a great eye.”
“Also, he’s going to make some jewelry for me. He needed pictures so Primrose can design something.”
I laughed. “Wow. Bespoke jewelry. It might be a small wedding but it won’t be cheap.”
A waitress interrupted to put something involving shrimp in front of us. “This is the first of the three starters.”
“We’re eating every option?” I asked, wondering if I should have dug out something to wear that had an elasticized waist. I’m sure I’d like the food, but I didn’t need three of everything.
“Tasting it. You don’t have to finish every plate but we have to know what it’s like. How else would we choose?”
“If you say so.” I wasn’t sure I’d be able to resist finishing every plate.
“So, how goes the job hunt?” Hollie asked. “Anything I can do?”
I shook my head as I tried to ignore the swirl of dread in my gut. “I’ve applied for lots of different things. There aren’t many management training programs starting in September that still have vacancies, but there are a few. And then I’ve applied for some entry-level positions at banks and insurers. I have a couple of interviews next week.” I’d rather focus on the food than have the inevitable conversation hurtling toward me. I didn’t want to think about the future, all the buts and what-ifs. I took a forkful of the shrimp and as I suspected, it tasted heavenly.
“So, you’re definitely going to stay in London?” she asked, bringing me back down to reality.
I wanted to be here with Hollie but realistically, I wasn’t sure that was possible. I was going to try. For now I didn’t need to mention the jobs I’d applied for in Portland, New York, and Tampa. Hopefully, I’d find something here. “I’m not sure. If I don’t get something by the beginning of August, then nothing will happen until September. The new nanny starts in a month and—”