“Are you ready for this?” I asked Harlowe as our carriage stopped. “With all apologies, you’ll soon see what it means to be associated with me.” Whatever the people thought of me, I hoped they’d give Harlowe the respect he deserved.
o;You should have forbidden her from going.”
“I could also command the sun not to rise and yet it would. She would have gone anyway, Jaron.”
“And what about you? I left you in a terrible position.”
“Not really.” Her long eyelashes fluttered, then she said, “My part in this was insignificant.”
“Nothing was more significant than to have someone to carry on for Carthya. Besides that, I put you at risk. Mott has already ridden on ahead to inform Kerwyn of Gregor’s treachery.” For that part, I barely looked at her. Gregor had been her closest friend. “My biggest worry was what would happen to you if I didn’t return.”
“If there was any threat, Gregor would have protected me. Whatever his intentions with you, he’d still have made sure I was safe.” She lowered her eyes. “I think he believed that once he sat on the throne, he’d have me for a wife.”
“Was he correct?”
She frowned. “Under no circumstances would I ever have accepted him. Did you think I could spend so much time with him and not see what he was?”
“Then you knew?”
“Not exactly. But I was suspicious. After your family’s deaths, I realized there had been small hints of his disloyalty. I made the decision to form a friendship with Gregor, hoping that in a closer relationship I could find some evidence against him. The only reason I brought Conner that dinner was because Gregor had suggested it. I think that was his way of testing me against you.”
“His test nearly worked. I was ready to declare you a traitor.” The thought of how things could have turned out so much worse made me shudder. I added, “You risked so much. Why didn’t you just tell me?”
She straightened her back. “I could barely tell you the time of day without you cutting off our conversation. Besides, he was your captain. I didn’t want to come to you with accusations that I couldn’t prove. Then everything happened so fast after the assassination attempt. I tried to talk with you late that night, but the vigils at your door told me you had snuck out and nobody knew where you were. Then you were gone so quickly the next morning.”
I leaned back in my chair and chuckled at that. With a curious tilt of her head, she said, “I just confessed to keeping a secret that nearly got you killed. I thought you’d be angry, not amused.”
“I’m only angry with myself.” I sighed. “Mott was right all along. I am a fool. I knew of your friendship with Gregor. Because of that, I wouldn’t talk to you either. If I had, everything might have been so much simpler.”
“Oh.” Amarinda smiled shyly. “It’s a wonder you and I found anything at all to talk about.”
“We didn’t, not really. Imogen kept asking me to make things right with you, but I wouldn’t. Any failure between us is entirely my fault.”
Amarinda pressed her lips together, then said, “I heard that Imogen stayed behind, in Libeth.”
“Yes.”
“Do you hate me, because I’m not her, because you’ll have to marry me one day?”
I stared at her a moment before I snorted out another impolite laugh. She flashed a glare that too quickly turned to pain. “Forgive me,” I said. “It’s just that those were nearly the words I’ve wanted to say to you all this time, and never dared.” Before she could speak, I added, “Do you hate me? Because I’m not my brother and because you’ll have to marry me one day?”
A very slow smile crossed her face and she gave an understanding nod and gestured with her hand. It brushed against mine. She started to pull it back but I took hers and held it, in a sign of our partnership, that from now on we would stand together. Her hand was closed in a fist at first, but she slowly relaxed and folded it into mine. I’d never held someone’s hand before, not like this. It was both wonderful and frightening.
“I’m letting her go,” I said. “And I’m asking you to let him go too.”
She nodded slowly. “Are we friends, Jaron?”
“We are.”
With her other hand, Amarinda brushed my forearm where the mark of the pirates was branded into my skin. The burn was still red and tender, but somehow it didn’t hurt the way she touched it.
“It might fade eventually,” I said, “but it will never go away.”
“It shouldn’t go away. It’s part of your history now. What you’ve done is a part of Carthya’s history.”
“Still, I’ll try to keep it hidden whenever possible.”
Amarinda’s grip tightened. “It’s not necessary for you to hide that. Nor to hide anything from me.”