I looked down at the paper in front of me, and this time I focused on the words.
One question at a time, I made my way through. I had to keep bringing my focus back to the test because my mind kept wondering about stupid things—like if Dastien meant that tonight was a date.
Which was stupid. Of course, it wasn’t a date. I wanted it to be a date, but Dastien probably felt sorry for me because my stomach growled so loud.
What had I been thinking agreeing to go to dinner at his place? What would we talk about? What would I say? Would he be able to tell that I already had a crush on him?
Oh my God. It was going to be so fucking awkward.
In that moment, it felt like he really wanted me to come over, but now I was second-guessing everything. Dastien was just so beautiful. He was way out of my league, and I was sure we had nothing in common. I mean, what did people that pretty do for fun?
Oh my God. I was ridiculous. Just because Dastien was pretty didn’t mean he was a separate species. The guy probably watched movies and worked out—because that was obvious—and streamed crappy TV, just like every other normal person.
And I wasn’t that bad-looking. I hated that I put myself down, but I couldn’t help it. Looks shouldn’t matter, but they did. They always mattered. And he was so far beyond me it wasn’t even funny.
My professor cleared his throat, and I could feel my cheeks getting hot. If he could tell that I wasn’t focusing on the page, then I was probably going to need that make-up test. But I didn’t want to retake this. So, I was going to get it together.
Dinner with Dastien was so not important. This exam was important.
I flipped through my test to see how many more questions I had to go. I needed to pass this class so that I could graduate on time next year. Once I was done with school, I could get a job. And then I wouldn’t have to rely on Mother’s support anymore. I would be free.
Only eleven more questions to go.
After that, I could go home and obsess about Dastien. But not before.
The rest of the time blurred, and suddenly, I was done. There were ten minutes left, so I went back through to double-check my answers. Everything looked good, but I wasn’t sure about a few of them.
My professor’s timer went off. I wanted more time, but that was it. If I failed, then at least he would give me a second chance.
I pushed back from my desk and walked to the front of the room.
Dr. Richmond looked up from the papers he was grading on his desk. “How’d you do?”
I handed him the test. “I think I did okay.” Unless I was so out of it that I didn’t register bombing it.
“I’ll take a quick look while you get your stuff. If you didn’t pass, then we’ll discuss what to do next. Okay?”
“Thanks.” It’d be good to know how I did right away. If I needed the redo, I might have to cancel on Dastien so that I could study.
That would also be a half-decent excuse to avoid a possibly awkward situation. I would cancel it if I could, but then I’d be a chicken. I’d been wanting more friends than just Georgine, and now one had fallen into my lap. I wasn’t going to let it go just because it scared me how much I wanted him.
I grabbed my backpack and slid my water bottle into the holder.
“Well,” Dr. Richmond said from the front of the room. “Looks like you aced it.”
I felt myself smile as his words registered. “Real
ly?” I hadn’t been expecting that.
“Really, and from the way you kept staring off into space, I thought you’d fail it for sure. You’ve impressed me.”
I impressed him? “Seriously?” That was pretty awesome.
“Yeah.” He put my test down. “Go get some rest. I’ll see you in class in a couple days.”
“Thanks. And thank you for coming in today to let me get the test over with. I didn’t want it hanging over my head this weekend.”
“It’s no problem. I was already here grading the rest of the class’s tests.” He waved his hand over the pile.