“Seth, after what happened with Jude, I guess I’m just worried.”
“I know.”
He’d talked to all three bonded mastyrs and knew that there was more than one way to bind himself to Lorelei if that was what he really wanted to do.
Quinlan, in particular, had defined the act more than anything as a strong effort of the will, of clear intention: to decide was to bond.
He walked the line, however, hovering just shy of a final commitment. He knew Lorelei was willing, that apparently she had less concerns than he did about what would happen once the bond was forged.
And he hated the thought of what he risked by not bonding with her. There was a strong likelihood that he’d end up battling for her again, if not Jude, then another mastyr.
In the middle of wrestling with Jude, he’d felt how much the experience had been a fight to the death. Without the help of the shifters to haul them away from each other, he was pretty sure one of them would have died. Given Jude’s brute strength, Seth knew he would have fallen on the ill-fated side of that coin toss.
“And you have no doubts that you want to bond with me?”
She turned in his arms slightly to place a kiss just below his ear. “If we were bonded, I’d never have to worry about another mastyr coming after me, tempting me. Besides, you must know by now that it’s you I want.”
He wanted to believe that Lorelei’s longing for him went beyond the call of the blood rose, but how could he trust her if she could so easily offer her vein to Jude?
He also knew that seeing Lorelei with another mastyr had brought up the old wound, the one Kristen had inflicted all those centuries ago. She’d cost him the one thing he should have been able to give to the woman of his choice, a heart free to love unreservedly.
“I just don?
??t know if I can believe any of this is real. The intimacy that would come from bonding with you would be built on air, nothing more.”
“That’s where we differ because I believe with all my heart that what we share between us is very real, despite that the blood rose part of me is willing to feed other mastyrs.”
He knew she was sincere in her belief, but he couldn’t agree with her. “I can’t do it, Lorelei, not under these circumstances.”
“Is it that you don’t trust me?”
He didn’t answer right away, because he wanted to respond as truthfully as he could. Finally, he said, “I believe in your character but I don’t trust the situation.”
She leaned up on her elbow to look down at him. “It’s okay. This is new to both of us so how about until Jude leaves, we just stick close together. How does that sound?”
“Like a good plan.”
Though she smiled softly, he couldn’t mistake the longing in her eyes.
Her gaze drifted over his face. “You look a lot better. That fight with Jude had you pretty bruised up.”
“Don’t remind me.” He huffed a sigh, scowling.
“Everything will be all right.”
He hadn’t loved anyone in a long time, but he was damn close to loving this woman.
With a sigh, he reached for the button that controlled the shades, lowering them just enough to prevent direct sunlight from entering the house. The remainder of the panorama view he retained, which consisted of a wintry sky filled with snow-covered trees, and the occasional hawk hunting through the quiet forest.
Putting his head on the pillow, he drew Lorelei into his arms, holding her close. “You can rest now.”
He needed to sleep as well. The brigade had a big battle coming.
* * * * * * * * *
Once Seth was sound asleep, Lorelei eased out of his arms so that he rolled on his back, his lean, powerful body spread out in relaxed disarray. She’d spied on him more than once during her weeks as his bodyguard, but she had to admit this was the first time she’d ever seen him so at peace.
She had a hard time defining all that she felt toward Seth of Walvashorr, but above all things she wanted his well-being.