This was the positive side of the newspaper article, and things might have ended there. I wanted my analysis of events to be wrong, but three days later, my prediction was confirmed. The negative side emerged in full force.
Employing the services of one of the most highly regarded and conservative law practices in Britain, whose senior partners--unlike Athena--really did have contacts in all spheres of the government, and basing his case on published statements made by Athena, the Reverend Buck called a news conference to say that he was suing for defamation, calumny, and moral damages.
The deputy editor called me in. He knew I was friendly with the central figure in that scandal and suggested that we publish an exclusive interview. My first reaction was of disgust: How could I use my friendship to sell newspapers?
However, after we had talked further, I started to think that it might be a good idea. She would have the chance to present her side of the story; indeed, she could use the interview to promote all the things for which she was now openly fighting. I left the deputy editor's office with the plan we had drawn up together: a series of articles on new trends in society and on radical changes that were taking place in the search for religious belief. In one of those articles, I would publish Athena's point of view.
That same afternoon, I went to her house, taking advantage of the fact that the invitation had come from her when we met outside the warehouse. The neighbors told me that, the day before, court officials had attempted to serve a summons on her but failed.
I phoned later on, without success. I tried again as night was falling, but no one answered. From then on, I phoned every half an hour, growing more anxious with each call. Ever since Hagia Sofia had cured my insomnia, tiredness drove me to bed at eleven o'clock, but this time anxiety kept me awake.
I found her mother's number in the phone book, but it was late, and if Athena wasn't there, then I would only cause the whole family to worry. What to do? I turned on the TV to see if anything had happened--nothing special, London continued as before, with its marvels and its perils.
I decided to try one last time. The phone rang three times, and someone answered. I recognized Andrea's voice at once.
"What do you want?" she asked.
"Athena asked me to get in touch. Is everything all right?"
"Everything's all right and not all right, depending on your way of looking at things. But I think you might be able to help."
"Where is she?"
She hung up without saying any more.
DEIDRE O'NEILL, KNOWN AS EDDA
Athena stayed in a hotel near my house. News from London regarding local events, especially minor conflicts in the suburbs, never reaches Scotland. We're not much interested in how the English sort out their little problems. We have our own flag, our own football team, and soon we will have our own parliament.
I let Athena rest for a whole day. The following morning, instead of going into the little temple and performing the rituals I know, I decided to take her and her son to a wood near Edinburgh. There, while the boy played and ran about among the trees, she told me in detail what was going on.
When she'd finished, I said, "It's daylight, the sky is cloudy, and human beings believe that beyond the clouds lives an all-powerful God, guiding the fate of men. Meanwhile, look at your son, look at your feet, listen to the sounds around you: down here is the Mother, so much closer, bringing joy to children and energy to those who walk over her body. Why do people prefer to believe in something far away and forget what is there before their eyes, a true manifestation of the miracle?"
"I know the answer. Because up there someone is guiding us and giving his orders, hidden behind the clouds, unquestionable in his wisdom. Down here we have physical contact with a magical reality, and the freedom to choose where our steps will go."
"Exactly. But do you think that is what people want? Do they want the freedom to choose their own steps?"
"Yes, I think they do. The earth I'm standing on now has laid out many strange paths for me, from a village in Transylvania to a city in the Middle East, from there to another city on an island, and then to the desert and back to Transylvania. From a suburban bank to a real estate company in the Persian Gulf. From a dance group to a bedouin. And whenever my feet drove me onward, I said yes instead of saying no."
"What did you gain from all that?"
"Today I can see people's auras. I can awaken the Mother in my soul. My life now has meaning, and I know what I'm fighting for. But why do you ask? You too gained the most important power of all--the gift of healing. Andrea can now prophesy and converse with spirits. I've followed her spiritual development every step of the way."
"What else have you gained?"
"The joy of being alive. I know that I'm here, and that everything is a miracle, a revelation."
The little boy fell over and grazed his knee. Instinctively, Athena ran to him, wiped the wound clean, told him not to worry, and the boy continued running about in the forest. I used that as a signal.
"What just happened to your little boy, happened to me. And it's happening to you too, isn't it?"
"Yes, but I don't think I stumbled and fell. I think I'm being tested again, and that my next step will be revealed to me."
At such moments, a teacher must say nothing, only bless the disciple. Because however much the teacher may want to save her disciple from suffering, the paths are mapped out and the disciple's feet are eager to follow them. I suggested we go back to the wood that night, just the two of us. She asked where she could leave her son, and I said that I would take care of that. I had a neighbor who owed me a favor and who would be delighted to look after Viorel.
As evening fell, we returned to that same place, and on the way, we spoke of things that had nothing to do with the ritual we were about to perform. Athena had seen me using a new kind of depilatory wax and was intrigued to know what advantages it had over the old methods. We talked animatedly about vanity, fashion, the cheapest places to buy clothes, female behavior, feminism, hairstyles. At one point she said something along the lines of: "But if the soul is ageless, I don't know why we should be so worried about all this," then realized that it was all right just to relax and talk about superficial subjects. More than that, such conversations were really fun, and how we look is something that's still very important in women's lives (it is in men's lives too, but in a different way, and they're not as open about it as we are).
As we approached the place I'd chosen--or, rather, which the wood was choosing for me--I started to feel the presence of the Mother. In my case, this presence manifests itself in a certain, mysterious inner joy that always touches me and almost moves me to tears. It was the moment to stop and change the subject.