“You make it sound…”
“Dirty? It is. Be proud of it. It can be liberating to claim the word for your own. Fuck what anyone else thinks. This is about you. Me.” Fuck him to kingdom come, his cock was hard. “Us.”
She looked at him, and passion had turned her eyes the color of scorched whiskey. “That’s hot,” she said.
“Take what I’m offering.”
“You scare me a little,” she admitted.
If that was true, she’d never shown it to him. “A little fear keeps a sub properly in compliance.”
“Was that meant to make me really scared?”
“Did it?”
“I’m probably foolish for admitting this, but no.”
“So what did it do to you?” he asked.
She was quiet for so long that he wasn’t sure she was going to answer.
“Be my slut,” he encouraged. “Tell me what my words did to you.”
“They excited me, made me want to know what would happen if I wasn’t in compliance, if I tested you.”
“I hope you can get what you want from me without having to do that. I hope you feel safe and secure enough with me to ask and trust instead of test.” And if she wasn’t, he’d be there to guide her, encourage her. “Has anyone used the paddle on you?”
“Seriously? No. Well, I mean, except for Andi.”
He frowned.
“She’s a girlfriend. It was her party that I attended. The salesperson passed it around and Andi smacked me. I was wearing jeans, so I didn’t feel anything.” Obviously trying for levity, she added, “She hits like a girl.”
“Use it on your hand.”
“What?”
Without repeating himself, he waited for her to do as he’d said.
“I feel ridiculous.”
In her eyes, Nathan saw the reflection of her struggle. Her gaze was fixed on him and she searched his features. Maybe for reassurance?
She picked up the paddle and struck the palm of her left hand. “It didn’t really hurt.”
“It wasn’t just that Andi hits like a girl. But I’d like to see that.”
She rolled her eyes. “Do all men say things like that?”
“Of course not. We all think it, though. But you’re right, this one makes a nice thud. It’s got two pieces that aren’t attached. It sounds sexy, but it doesn’t do a lot of damage. Unlike a real paddle made of leather or wood, which is what I wanted you to know.” He took another step into the room. “It sounds intimidating, though, doesn’t it? And that adds to the experience, the sensuality of the whole thing.”
“I’m not sure I understand.”
“In a scene, all of your senses should be involved. The scent of leather, or perhaps PVC. A paddle like that will make a very satisfying sound when it lands on the fleshy part of your ass.”
She continued to look at him, as if riveted by what he had to say.
“Sometimes I use a blindfold on my subs, but I do it deliberately to enhance the other senses, make the anticipation even keener. But one thing I want you to be clear about, the word on your paddle? It only has the meaning you choose. To me, it means a woman who is sexy and confident, who knows what she wants. Including her man, her Dom. I never disrespect women, and I don’t ever use that term in a derogatory way. But I want my sub to be my slut, to desire me the way I crave her. There’s no room for pretense, only honesty. Calling someone my fuck slut is among the highest honors there is. It means she’s mine, that she appreciates and values me the way I do her.”
She exhaled. “That might take some rearranging of my brain cells.”
“Happy to help.”
“I’m sure you are.”
“What else is in there?” He folded his arms across his chest and waited.
She pulled out a pair of wooden clothespins.
“Where do you put those when you masturbate? And don’t tell me you don’t use them.”
“Do you not allow anyone to have secrets?”
“Where do you use them, Kelsey?”
“My nipples.”
“Plastic ones are better, since they don’t twist. Metal clamps are better yet. But these can be used elsewhere. Like your toes.”
“What?” She gasped. “Are you kidding me?”
“Certain things I don’t joke about. And sex? The things I’d enjoy doing to your body? I take that very, very seriously.”
“I could use a safe word, right? I mean, hypothetically, if we were going to try that?”
“Absolutely. But if you are merely uncertain or nervous about something, I’d encourage you to try it.”
She flicked a glance back to the pins. “Putting them on my toes sounds painful.”