“They came to me just before midnight the night before the event to tell me they’d gotten a call. They didn’t have to say more after that. I knew how it would play out. It was the same every time. They were gone before I woke up in the morning. My grandmother came and picked me up from the Brooklyn house and drove me to the competition like she had done every other time when I wasn’t living with her.”
I sense his discomfort in the way he shifts and glances at the ocean. It’s never easy for me to share, but he has me wanting to make him feel better. The truth. That’s what I owe him, so he’ll understand more of what he’s dealing with when it comes to me. But then he lifts me and holds me on his lap, his arms secure around me, and asks, “Are you okay? You don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to.”
Why is the option to shut down so appealing? With Gil in my head, pushing me forward, and Drew wriggling his way into my heart, I say, “It was my turn. I stepped into the spotlight on the stage, ready to present my findings, but that’s when I heard a sudden murmuring rush through the audience. A few gasps. I heard them and tried to figure out what was going on.
That’s when my best friend, my boyfriend, who was competing there that day, came out and whispered in my ear.” Digging into my hip he holds me closer. I say, “Your parents . . . the Amazon . . . the plane . . .”
Turning to find the comfort I desperately need from him, tears roll down my cheeks, and I push myself to continue, “They couldn’t get to the crash site for five days. For five days, I waited to have confirmed what I already felt inside.” For those five days I was numb. I cried and felt so lost. Alone. Betrayal didn’t come until later. That was all on Karl. Because as the murmurs had quieted and I’d been led from the hall, he presented my paper as if it was his own. Claimed it as his own.
This time, I don’t hide my eyes. This time, I find the peace I need in the soulful warmth of his admiring browns. “I’m sorry, Juni.”
My tears dry as a little water glistens in his. And somehow, a little piece of my soul begins to heal. I’m not sure why or how, but solace is found in sharing my story with someone after all these years. Maybe because for the first time, there isn’t the withdrawal of the microphone or phone, saying the information wanted was gained. Maybe because this time, there is someone to hold me while I grieve.
27
Drew
The day’s been busier than I expected, but with Juni, I always crave more time. Her honesty, the raw emotions, and her trust were placed in my hands when she opened up about her parents.
She’s made me an insider. That’s a role I don’t take lightly.
After sex, well, duh, and a short nap, I’m woken up by my phone buzzing across the nightstand. Nick. I’m tempted to let it go to voicemail, but he usually just texts. So the fact he’s calling has me curious as to what’s going on.
Grabbing the phone, I slip out of bed and go into the bathroom so I don’t wake Juni. “Hey, what’s up?”
“Did you forget? You forgot. Fuck, Andrew, I promised Natalie.”
I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I look like shit with my hair in disarray and my unshaven face. Great, I silently grumble. I’m turning into a New Yorker. “Slow down. What did I forget?”
“Dinner at my house. I told you about it weeks ago.”
“That’s on the twenty—oh fuck.”
“Yeah, the twenty-fourth, also known as today. You better get dressed and get over here, but I’m not letting you back out even if I have to come drag you over here myself.”
Peering back at Juni sleeping, I keep my voice low, and ask, “What time is dinner?”
“You have an hour. I can stall for another thirty minutes, but after that, Natalie will lose it if her meal is served cold.”
“You still have me down for a plus-one?”
“If it’s Juni, yes. Anyone else, I don’t want to do the dog and pony show. I just want to have a relaxed and fun night surrounded by people we know.”
I know what he means without the details. Not only is he cursed with the tycoon last name of Christiansen but his wife and her family are Manhattan famous. Reminded of Juni and her parents and the fame that came with that has me glad she’s been able to live in relative peace all these years. She carries a lot of burdens, but she’s good at keeping her last name in relation to her parents on the down low.