She sighed into the phone. “I know, chica. You still need more time. I get that.”
I was thankful for her understanding. Rachel made me feel less alone and a little less crazy.
“Thanks. I’m gonna go.”
“Okay. And for the record? I’m sorry.”
When we ended the call, I sat there with my phone in my hand, debating whether to shoot Nick a text.
In the end, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. The fear of what he might say was far greater than my need to know where he was. It was obvious he wasn’t coming up here. And the rational part of me knew that was for the best, even if my heart didn’t agree.
My heart would eventually get on board with the rest of me. I was sure of it.
Continually Screwed
Nick
My brothers’ bar was closed for the night, but I had no intention of leaving. It was the only place where I found any sort of solace lately. Their bar had become my escape, my sole place of peace.
“Have you talked to Jess?” Ryan asked from behind the bar where he was washing and hand-drying glasses. I would have thought that he knew something about my call to her last night if he didn’t ask me that question every time I saw him.
Because he did ask. Every fucking time. And the answer was always the same as the last time he’d asked.
No.
“I might have called her last night. I was drunk out of my mind,” I said, and both my brothers stopped what they were doing to give me shocked looks.
“Classy,” Frank said with an eye roll from across the room.
“It’s the only time I have even half a ball to dial her number, okay?” I admitted, and it was the truth.
I had wanted to call Jess every second of every single day, no matter how busy I was at work, but I couldn’t do that to her. Not if I couldn’t offer her a relationship or tell her I wanted to get back together. Calling her would only hurt her, and up until last night, I’d been trying my best not to do that anymore. I knew I’d already hurt her enough. Hell, I’d hurt us both enough.
“I don’t understand why you let her go in the first place. Explain that to me, little brother.”
Strange that the question came from Frank; I would have expected it from Ryan. He was definitely the more romantic of two of them, whereas Frank was stuck in some relationship he couldn’t seem to get out of. That aside, I’d already told both of them this a thousand times.
I groaned and lifted my beer for a sip. “You already know why.”
“We just like to hear how stupid it sounds when it comes out of your mouth,” Ryan said with a laugh.
“Yeah. And we’re hoping one of these times it will sound stupid to you too. Idiot,” Frank added.
I moved my stool back to stand up and face off with my brothers. “You’re supposed to fucking help me. Not make me feel worse.”
Ryan stepped in front of me, his eyes meeting mine. “Sit back down. You’re right. We’re just giving you shit.”
“I can’t take it right now, okay? Between Dad and the pressure to take over the company one day, and he keeps pushing me to date Carla so our families can merge and be this superpower entertainment giant—”
“Wait. What?” Frank and Ryan said at the same time. Ryan dropped a glass, its shattering on the tile floor deafening in the quiet bar, but neither of them paid it any mind.
“What are you talking about?” Frank asked, his green eyes narrowing as he leveled a hard look at me.
“Which part?” I took another sip of beer, wishing it were something stronger.
Frank and Ryan looked at each other before looking back at me. “All of it?” they both said. You’d almost think they were twins sometimes with the way their minds were so in sync.
When I just shrugged, Frank walked over and snatched my almost empty glass of beer away from me.<