Tears continued to pour out as she kept quiet, unsure of what to say.
“Answer me, Caroline!” he demanded. “You owe me at least that much.”
“I don’t know,” she lied.
“At least give me enough respect to tell me to my face.” His fist slammed against the table and Caroline jumped.
She answered throu
gh short, rapid breaths. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Yes.” She tried to steady her breathing. “Yes, I love him.”
“Get out.”
“But…” Her face twisted in agony as her eyes pleaded with Clay to understand.
His chest heaved under his shirt. “Get out. Get your stuff another time. I need you to leave. Now.” He glared at her, hatred filled his watery eyes.
Caroline rose from the table, grabbed her purse, and ran out the door. She flung herself into the black iron railing and peered down at the ground, three stories below. She panted as tears fell from her face. She followed the marble stairs down one floor before she crumbled to the ground, desperate to release the pain. If there was ever a day she felt worse in her life, she wasn’t sure she could pinpoint it.
Of course getting the news about Jackson had forced her to experience agony on a level she never knew existed. Every single breath physically hurt to breathe. Jackson’s accident filled her with regret, sorrow, and worry. She was terrified that Jackson might die and that fear overwhelmed her constantly. It was the kind of pain that made her whole world violently crash in around her.
She explained it to Bailey once. “It’s like looking into a full-length mirror and seeing nothing but pure beauty in the reflection…and then watching helplessly as it shatters into a thousand pieces before your eyes, knowing that you can do nothing to keep it from breaking…”
But this was different.
The pain and heartbreak that currently ensued with Clay was completely within her control. She was solely responsible. No matter how right the decision was for her, nothing could ease the torment of hurting another.
And it wasn’t like she didn’t love Clay. She did. He was everything she had ever wanted in life, until Jackson came along and screwed it all up. Now she broke off her engagement and ended the chapter she assumed was going to be her whole book. It hurt to walk away from a relationship that wasn’t flawed, imperfect, or unhealthy. It hurt to leave something so comfortable.
Once her heart felt steady, she started down the rest of the stairs and fumbled through her purse for her phone. She dialed Bailey’s number at work.
“Packed already?” Bailey asked without even saying hello.
“No. Clay was waiting for me. I told him about Jackson.”
“You did WHAT?” Bailey yelled.
“He asked! I couldn’t lie.”
“So what happened?” Bailey whispered loudly.
“I’ve never seen him so mad,” Caroline confessed as she tried unsuccessfully to block the image from her memory.
“Really? That’s kinda hot.”
“Bays.”
“Sorry, it’s just I didn’t think the guy had it in him. He’s always so composed all the time.”
Caroline let out an annoyed breath. “Great. Can we discuss your appreciation for Clay’s anger later?”
“Definitely. So wait, did you get your stuff or not?”
“That’s why I’m calling. He kicked me out before I could get anything,” Caroline answered, clearly flustered.
Bailey stifled a laugh. “Shut UP! That guy’s full of surprises!”
“BAILEY!” Caroline screamed into the phone.