Caroline’s eyes widened with surprise. “No. They aren’t sure he’ll wake up. And if he does, there’s no guarantee that he’ll be the same.” She fought to hold back the tears that formed.
He reached out his hand and put it on her shoulder. “I’m sure he will. He’ll be okay.”
Caroline knew Clay didn’t have to say that. He didn’t have to ask about Jackson. Hell, he didn’t even have to stop and talk to her at all.
“Thanks,” she said, as she looked down at the ground. “I’m really sorry about everything, Clay. Truly I am. I never meant to hurt you.” Her eyes met his.
Clay nodded. “I know. I’ve done a lot of thinking these past couple of months. You know, I never should have proposed to you that night anyway.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, her eyes wide with surprise.
“I just mean
…” He arched his eyebrows while he thought for a moment. “I did it for all the wrong reasons. I mean, I knew something was off between us. And instead of trying to figure out what it was, I just tried to fix it.”
He shrugged his shoulders. “I thought proposing would solve everything and make whatever it was that was wrong…right. I thought it would instantly make you happy again.”
Caroline refused to let Clay shoulder any blame. “But I should have talked to you. I should have told you what was going on with me. I should have been honest, but I was too busy trying to fight off everything I was feeling. I tried to pretend that I was okay, when I wasn’t.”
“But I knew you weren’t okay. And I didn’t even try to talk to you about it. In all honesty, you were the last person I ever worried about losing or falling apart. I feel like I took you for granted.” His head shook.
“You’d never had a reason to worry before. This thing with Jackson…it was beyond any of our control. I know it sounds stupid, but it was never about you and me. I knew how much you loved me, Clay, and I never felt taken for granted.” She longed for her truth to comfort him.
“Thank you,” Clay responded, his mouth unsmiling and his gaze sincere.
“I mean it. I really am sorry.” The pain she caused still burdened her.
“I know you are.” Clay shifted his weight. “Look, Care, I used to want to make you hurt just as badly as I did. But now that feels like a long time ago. I don’t want you to be upset any more. I really am okay. And I want you to be, too.”
She was happily surprised when he leaned in to hug her. Her body warmed in his familiar arms as she spoke gently in his ear. “Thank you so much. I wish you the best in everything. You truly deserve it.”
Clay smiled and as Caroline started to walk away, she heard him call her name. Her stomach dipped as she turned to face him. “I forgive you.” He looked at his feet and then back up into her eyes. “I think I understand why you did what you did.”
It was as if an SUV lifted off of her shoulders and the blame she carried shattered to the ground at her feet. She almost fell to the sidewalk in relief, but braced herself against a cement parking meter. “Thank you, Clay,” she answered through her tears as she watched him continue down the street with Gina at his side.
Her body felt light and each breath filled her with relief. She hadn’t realized the extent of the guilt she had been carrying until it fell free from her. She had lived with it for so long that it had become a part of her. In hoping that her words could help him heal, he had just given her the ultimate gift…the gift of forgiveness.
Chapter Nineteen
When Jackson first opened his eyes, all he could make out were blurry shapes and patches of light and dark. The shapes slowly turned into blurry images and he could distinguish the faces of his parents…then Sally, Tommy, and Alex. He tried to smile, but his mouth felt like he had just left the dentist’s office.
****
Alex and Tommy stood in the back of the room as Jackson’s parents were briefed; Sally hovered nearby. The doctor was encouraging as she spoke to his parents. “Jackson is responding more quickly than we expected after reducing his medication. It will be a few days before we can determine the extent of the damage, though.” She went on, “Jackson will need extensive physical therapy to regain basic motor functions. There is the possibility of speech therapy, as well.”
Alex high-fived Sally and Tommy at the news and congratulations were exchanged all around. Jackson’s friends didn’t know what the future held for him, but one thing was certain—he would get to have one.
****
Caroline received a call at work with the good news. “Hey, Caroline, it’s Alex!”
At first, her heart stopped when she saw Alex’s name on her caller ID, but the tone of his voice immediately erased any concerns she had about the call bearing bad news. “Hi! What’s up? How are you?”
“I’m great! I just wanted you to know that he opened his eyes.”
Caroline’s grin stretched from ear to ear. “Really? When?”
“About ten minutes ago.”