Mark and Shawn continued to hash out ideas as we all sat on the beach; they soon became engrossed in their conversation, throwing out one crazy harebrained idea after another.
While the guys hashed out ideas that could have been an episode of X-Files, Sam and I drifted away a little, so we could share some girl talk more openly.
“This is hard to believe,” I said, still trying to wrap my brain around the ideas Shawn had thrown out. I sifted sand through my hand and watched as it cascaded through my fingers.
“I don’t know. I’m kind of relieved that we’re starting to figure things out. I would rather it be something crazy, than never knowing what happened. I hate not knowing where we’re from or where our parents are,” Sam said.
I felt a small wave of guilt for forgetting that Sam had always been by herself. Of course she would want answers. She had not been as lucky as me. I was loved and raised by two caring people.
“I’m sorry. You’re right. Even if it’s crazy, we still need to find out the truth.”
I decided to change the subject. “So, what does Shawn think about this whole situation?” I asked.
“Well, like all of us, he wants to get to the bottom of all this, but I think he feels similar to me and just wants to find out what happened to his real parents. He had it pretty tough growing up too, but puts on an ‘I don’t care’ attitude, so no one can see just how much it influenced him. His foster dad died five years ago, and Shawn hit the road. He said his foster dad was mean as a snake, and he wasn’t taking the chance of being placed in another abusive foster home.”
Our conversation was interrupted by the guys.
“Shawn and I think it’s imperative that we start aggressively searching the internet to find out exactly what happened on this beach to tie all of us together.”
“We don’t have to leave right away though if you girls still want to ride more rides,” Shawn added.
Though we were anxious to explore the internet to find out some answers, we voted, and decided it could wait a while. Sam still wanted to ride some of the rides at the Boardwalk. It was decided that we would play for a few hours and then get down to work.
I couldn’t help my nagging feeling, like we were wasting time, but they had a point, the internet would be there later.
Sam lightened the mood as she dragged us on all the rides. I tried to balk when Sam headed back toward the “Giant Dipper,” but she talked me into it.
The second time on the ride seemed to be faster than the first, and I my legs were quaking from the adrenaline rush by the time the ride screeched to a halt.
Mark laughed at my shaky legs when I tried to stand. He put his arm around me, to steady me. I took advantage of having him so close and snuggled in even closer. He didn’t seem to mind; in fact he tightened his hold on me. As we made our way toward the exit of the ride, Sam started clamoring to ride the “Double Shot.” The same ride mom and I had made fun of. It was hard to believe that just last week we had mocked the ride, and how lonely I had felt. Now, I was surrounded by people that felt like family, and that I could trust.
“No way,” I said as Sam turned, pleading eyes on me.
“I think she needs to sit this one out Sam,” Mark said.
Sam looked at my slightly green face and must have agreed with him, because they headed off by themselves to give the giant rubber band like ride a try.
Mark led me to a bench and sat down next to me. I laid my head on his shoulder and looked down at our linked fingers. Though his was much larger, our hands fit together as snuggly as a puzzle piece in the right slot. Usually, public forms of affection mortified me, but I just couldn’t seem to find a problem with this.
“I love you,” Mark said quietly.
“What?” I said, still wrapped up in what his touch was doing to me.
“I love you,” he repeated a little louder this time. “I know it may be too soon to say it, but I needed you to know how I felt.”
I sat in silence for a few moments.
“I’m not trying to rush you,” Mark said, sounding slightly panicked.
“It’s not what you said. It’s just, are you sure? I know we’ve shared the dreams all these years, but aren’t you slightly disappointed at how I turned out?” I asked, feeling my cheeks blaze up in embarrassment.
Mark laughed. “Are you kidding me? You’re everything I imagined and more. I feel like the luckiest guy in the world.”
“Are you sure? Even with all my flaws?” I persisted, pointing to my red cheeks to prove my point.
Mark ran his hand down my cheek. “I love everything about you; your smile, your quirky sense of humor, but most of all your sensitivity. We are a match.”
Love. He had said the word that I craved to hear the most. Sure, I heard it growing up, but I always felt my adoptive parents had to say the words. I knew that not all people loved me, case in point, my own real parents obviously had not. To think that just this morning, I had been tempted to throw in the towel when I thought he might leave me, but instead he was professing his love for me.