Biker's Virgin

“Of course,” Mila nodded, giving me a smile.

I walked in, and Mila closed the door behind me. I saw a couple of papers with Devon’s handwriting on them, and I realized she had been going through the information he’d given her about different towns around the US. She was trying to figure out where to move to, and I felt my mood decline even further.

I made a decision at that moment. I resolve never to let her see how badly this was affecting me. If this was what she wanted, then who was I to stand in her way? I wiped my expression clean and gestured towards the papers.

“Going somewhere?” I asked.

“Well… yes,” Mila nodded. “I suppose I am soon. I can’t stay here forever.”

She was looking at me intently, and I managed to give her a small smile. “No, I suppose not. That was never the plan anyway.”

Mila nodded, and that sent a dagger straight through my chest. “Exactly,” she said sadly.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Mila

The conversation I’d had with the cops had helped somewhat. I suppose in some strange way, it was closure. I knew that Walter Black or Ghost or whoever he was, was really and truly gone. I remembered the moment I’d smashed into him. His body had felt like a boulder in my path, and even though I’d seen him collapse, even though I believed he had died, I hadn’t hung around long enough to find out.

With the car stalled and broken, I got out and ran in the opposite direction, praying that he was dead or at the very least unable to run after me. The cops had assured me that he was, in fact, dead and that there were no charges placed on me because of the fact that I had been acting in self-defense. It was really the best-case scenario considering the circumstances, and I was relieved.

But now that that particular hurdle was done with, my mind was free to think about the next decision I had to make. I couldn’t stay in the house anymore with the boys. Zack had offered me protection until Walter Black was dealt with. He hadn’t allowed me permanent residence though, nor did I expect it. This wasn’t my life… and the incident with Walter Black had made me realize that it never would be.

Zack had always been really honest about who he was and what he wanted. And now I knew I had to be honest with myself. Zack had been clear from the beginning: he was not a one-woman kind of guy. He was not big on long-term commitments. But the truth was that I was, and attempting to continue a relationship with him could only end in heartbreak… at least in my case.

I was self-aware enough to admit that I loved him. He was the first man I had ever felt so strongly about, but I knew that I couldn’t stay in this town anymore. It was too close to him. I would drive myself crazy. So my only real option was to leave. To start someplace new and hopefully with time I would learn to live without Zack.

It felt a daunting task, but it was my only option. I was thinking about that when Devon walked into the kitchen.

“Hi,” he said brightly. “You’re finally out of your room.”

“I just came to grab something to eat,” I said.

“At least your appetite is coming back.”

“Slowly,” I nodded.

“I know this is probably an annoying question, but how are you?”

I smiled. “I’m good… most of the time. I suppose I’m just preoccupied.”

“About… Walter?”

“No,” I said. “About my future… I’m thinking of leaving soon.”

“I can find you a small apartment close by,” Devon suggested.

“No,” I said. “I appreciate that but… I’m actually thinking about leaving town.”

“Oh,” Devon said, and I could tell he hadn’t expected that. “Really?”

“I think I need a fresh start,” I nodded. “Away from…all this.”

“Away from this lifestyle, you mean?” Devon asked.

“I don’t judge you, Devon,” I said. “Honestly, actually a part of me understands why you’ve chosen this life. There is a brotherhood here that’s hard to deny. But that’s exactly my point. It’s a brotherhood, and there’s no room for me here.”

“I’ll do some research for you,” Devon told me. “I’m sure there are tons of nice little towns you can settle in.”