“No, I didn’t call you stupid. I said you’re being stupid,” she said. “One you can fix. The other you can’t.”
I frowned. “I should slap you, Perri.” My hand twitched to do that.
“In church?” She snorted. “I should slap you, then. You have a great thing with Alex. Lord knows it shouldn’t have worked. You two have wanted each other as long as Carl and I were eyeing each other. He left.” She shook her head. “And then Alex came back and knocked you up. And when he found out, the first thing he did was want to be part of your life and not try to run away screaming.”
I rubbed my temples. Why couldn’t she understand? “I’m not saying he’s a bad guy. I’m worried about him spending too much.”
Perri shook her head. “No. You’re looking for problems. This is just negative thinking. You know what they say. You get out of the world what you put into it.” She gulped down some coffee. “You need to get over this before you end up messing up something great.”
“I don’t think it’s crazy or stupid to worry where he’s getting the money to buy all those things.”
Perri threw her
free hand in the air. “Then ask him, woman. Worrying about it won’t do cr—” She closed her eyes and took a deep sigh before glancing over at a picture of Jesus on the wall. “Worrying about it won’t help. The best thing to do is be honest with him. Like Carl was with me. Now, we can move forward, and so will you and Alex.”
I nodded slowly, chewing on that. “Hey, has Carl said anything about Alex borrowing money?”
Perri let out a long groan and started walking away. “I’m not gonna stand by and watch my best friend be stupid about the man she’s been into for half her life. Talk to Alex if you wanna know. Not my business otherwise.”
I stood there, Styrofoam cup in hand, watching my friend walk away. Alex had returned to Livingston to get back on his feet. It wasn’t crazy to be concerned about him doing something that might make his problems worse.
Guilt gnawed at my stomach. If he were doing it for himself, that’d be sad, but he was doing it to impress me. There was no other explanation for what was going on. He’d borrowed a bunch to convince me he was responsible.
I slumped against the wall, my heart thundering. Perri was right. I had no choice. I had to confront Alex about his spending.
Chapter 34
Alex
Nothing like looking over your money on a Monday night. I chuckled to myself at the thought. I was still getting a handle on where to put what, but at least I had some actual investments now.
Even before the accident, I’d been sitting on a decent amount of money. When you never really spend anything, it was easy to save. But at the same time, I’d never cared about making a bunch more money. I guess I never really believed the kind of future would come for me where I’d need a lot of money.
Now, though, I didn’t have only my future to worry about but also that of my daughter. From what little I’d learned about starting a college fund for Kadie, I’d need to talk to her mother so we could work out some details first.
Not that I felt like I had to get that figured out anytime soon. Sure, my little girl was smart, but she still wasn’t going to college anytime soon.
Sitting at my new dining room table, I looked at the mess of numbers on my laptop screen. The whole thing gave me a bit of a headache, but in the end, it was the good kind of pain. That money represented freedom.
Not only freedom for me to return to Livingston and heal from the nightmares, but freedom for my daughter and her mother. It’d become obvious to me that things had been tighter for Kadie and Aspyn over the last few years than I’d first realized.
It was the little things I noticed at first, how worn down her furniture was, how she needed new tires, lots of things like that. By themselves, none of them were a big deal, but all together, they worried me.
Having her mother around and other people had helped, but I should have been there to support them. Her mother shouldn’t have had to start a daycare to make sure my daughter had somewhere to stay while her mother worked.
I gritted my teeth at the thought. It wasn’t fair to Aspyn, and it wasn’t fair to Kadie. Yes, I didn’t know, but a big part of that was because I’d been too chickenshit to contact Aspyn after my accident.
I didn’t think my daughter had suffered, but that’s only because her mother and grandmother did everything they could, despite not having me to back them up. If I’d been more of a man instead of being a coward, they wouldn’t have had to work so hard. The whole thing made my stomach churn with shame.
I’d never claimed to be a smart man or a wise one, but I did know one important thing, something my dad had pounded into my head over my childhood. A man’s duty was to protect his woman and child. Even though my mom had left, my dad still believed that, and he’d focused on protecting me.
Unlike my dad, I’d failed that duty, but I had a chance for redemption. The good Lord had mercifully steered me back to Livingston, and now I knew what I needed to do, and I had the tools to do it.
My heart swelled with pride at the thought. The future lay before me, wide and open. I was partners now with Carl, and we’d make Ranch 2.0 the best damn ranch in all of Tennessee. Screw that; we’d make it the best damn ranch in the entire South.
I shot up from the table, renewed purpose filling my mind. I needed to tell Aspyn the truth about how I felt. The longer I was wishy-washy, the longer she’d keep me at arm’s length. That was another part of being a man.
Someone knocked on my front door. I furrowed my brow and headed toward the door. I’d spent most of the day helping Carl, more than I’d planned because I was supposed to be working on my house, but he’d made it clear that he’d leave me alone that night.