"And I won't. I appreciate it, Ivy, I really do. I'm just not ready to date right now."
"Or have fun," Ivy muttered.
I leaned my head back against the seat and tried to think of the last time I had actually had fun. After Stan's announcement, everything was a blur. I'd seen Rainer here and there in the office, but we never got a chance to talk alone. I wondered if he was mad at me for accepting Stan's offer and leaving everyone behind, but that didn't seem like something he would do. Still, he didn't reach out to me, and the only conclusion I could reach was that he was moving on. With Ellison.
I squeezed my eyes shut. The last time I had fun was on Berger's yacht when I knew Rainer was following me down the narrow hallway to that private cabin. It took everything I had to push that memory aside.
The rest of the flight was heavenly seeing as I was able to leave everything up to the first class crew and Ivy. A limousine was waiting to take me home, and though I cringed at the attention it garnered, I was glad when Ivy shut the door and waved my driver on. One thing I was discovering as a business woman and rising CEO was how focused everyone still was on personal relationships. I was turning out to be a very desirable bachelorette.
That's why, when the limousine stopped outside the quaint little white Victorian house on the hill, I had to stifle a groan. My sister was stretching her sore back in the middle of the sidewalk but waved energetically when she saw me.
"What do you think?" Barbie called as I climbed out of the limousine. Only my sister could ignore the long, stylish car balanced precariously on the steep East Bay hill. "I went with white and blue. Not too girly. Do you like it?"
My limousine driver trotted over to help Barbie before she hefted a large flowering shrub. She laughed, pressing both hands to her belly, and then turned back to me. "Welcome home."
I automatically glanced back down the hill where my little condominium was still nestled on the hillside. I had moved all of four doors, but it was a big change. Not only had my view improved to include three bridges and all of San Francisco, but I'd traded up for a five bedroom classic. Barbie had raved about the bay windows and built-in window seats, the crown molding and the hand-carved banister up the polished stairs. But I had bought it for the garden.
Months after Hyperion had been sold, the only solace I had found was digging in the garden.
The white Victorian boasted an acre-sized lot broken into graceful terraces, and even a small orchard row. I had slowly been filling in the rolling garden beds, but Barbie had done wonders.
"I love it," I told my sister.
She rolled up her sleeves. "Good," she said. "Now, let's talk about the interior."
"Can I at least unpack first?" I asked. My limousine driver jumped to collect my bags and bring them inside.
Barbie eyed my slim suitcase. "You know you don't even have a dresser yet, right?"
"So, it's a little sparse inside. I just haven't had time to buy new furniture," I said.
"And maybe you're just waiting." Barbie followed me closely up the front steps. "Furniture is a big decision."
My sister was right. I was hesitating because every time I went to look at furniture all I could think about was what Rainer would look like lounging on it. "Actually, it's such a nice day, why don't we sit out here and work on the garden some more?" I asked.
Barbie waddled ahead to show me what she'd been working on. One garden bed was completely jam-packed with wildflowers. "I mixed the colors so you can just cut a bunch and bring them inside."
She had plans to add fragrant plants to each bed, letting the scents blend before they breezed in my front windows. Then Barbie showed me the sunny spot where she envisioned a raised garden bed for vegetables.
"I was thinking a window box full of herbs would be nice right outside the kitchen," I said.
Barbie heaved her rounded frame into the bushes outside the kitchen and pulled out a measuring tape. I started to laugh but ended up just admiring my beautiful sister. No matter what she was doing, Barbie always had a contented and settled look to her smile. She knew what she wanted and appreciated what she had.
I had been pouring everything I had into work, and I still didn't have the air of satisfaction that my big sister did. I stepped back into the sunshine and took in my heirloom house and blooming garden. The idea of a house-warming party jumped into my head, and as Barbie measured for a window box, I imagined what it would be like to host my friends and colleagues.
Rainer would walk through the front gate and his head would brush the wisteria. He would see me, and we'd embrace, normal for two close co-workers, but I would take an extra second to smell the flowers mixed with his cologne.
"Please tell me you're not planning a presentation," Barbie said.
I helped her back onto level ground. "No. But I was thinking about a house-warming party. I mean, I know it's not the big flashy mansion that most of my colleagues have, but it's a real historical gem."
"Would you invite everyone from Hyperion?" Barbie asked. "It would be nice to see that Rainer again."
I stiffened as if a bee had stung me. "Why do you say that?"
Barbie smiled at me. "He's a handsome guy. A girl can look. Even pregnant ones."
"Don't tease me, Barbie," I wailed. "Ivy's already done enough of that."