My hope that Jess and Chloe’s relationship would heal backfired on me.
Someone came into the store and walked up to the counter. Sierra looked over her shoulder at the customer. “I have to take this.”
I nodded and turned away from her. I pressed my palm over my mouth and let out several shaky breaths. What had I done?
“Daddy?” Gina asked from behind me.
I dropped down to her level and took her hands in mine. This had all been my fault, but I couldn’t keep it from her any longer. I glanced over at Sierra, who made a point of not staring in my direction, but I knew she was listening. She’d probably report back to Jess when she spoke with her next.
“Jess isn’t here anymore,” I said.
“Why?” Gina asked. “Doesn’t she love us?”
“She does,” I said. Looking into Gina’s glossy eyes made my heart hurt. “But she had to go back to Australia.”
“And she didn’t want to take us again?” Gina asked.
“No, honey. We need to stay here.”
“She didn’t even say goodbye,” Gina said and fell into my arms.
I lifted her off the ground and started for the door. I waved goodbye to Sierra and left the store.
“It’s not her fault, honey,” I said to Gina once we were outside. “It’s mine.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Jess
I woke Saturday morning, thankful that I could do it without an alarm. It only took me a week to get used to waking up later, and another week to sleep up until the few minutes before I had to leave for my new job. Mom had contacted a friend of hers who worked at an antique shop in town as they were looking for a new assistant. They were gracious since I didn’t know the first thing about antiques. They were doing Mom a favor by hiring me. I didn’t like the idea of sitting home all day doing nothing except for thinking about Gina and Noah, so I accepted the job without question.
Besides, this was temporary. I intended to take another nanny position as soon as I found one. There was nothing in the immediate area except for babysitting jobs for date nights for parents. While I wasn’t above babysitting, I was holding out for something more permanent. So the antique store it was!
Since it was my day off, I rolled over, fully intending to sleep for another hour or so before heading to the beach. But the moment I closed my eyes, I heard Mom slamming around in the kitchen.
One of the things I loved about living alone was not worrying about someone waking me up. I supposed Mom had tried to be quiet when Noah and Gina were here, but since I’d arrived, she didn’t bother with the niceties. I slowly recalled that this was what she was like when I grew up in the house. It had nothing to do with her drinking. She was a loud person in general.
I gritted my teeth and shoved the blankets off my body. I sat up and touched my feet to the cool hardwood floor. I rubbed my palms over my eyes and stood up, stretching my arms above my head. In the two weeks of living down there, my body still hadn’t adjusted to the stiffness of the bed. When I had Noah in bed with me during my trip, I hadn’t noticed. The warmth of his body against my back eased me to sleep.
I glanced around the room at my personal belongings still packed into several moving boxes. I reached into my suitcase on the floor and lifted my robe, throwing it around my body. For some reason, a chill ran through me that morning. Probably because I thought of Noah. That same shiver trickled down my spine each time I thought of him. Though it was better than bursting into tears.
The move to Mona Vale was drastic but necessary. For once, Mom was right about something. If Noah didn’t want me with him, then me sticking around the area would only hurt me. In my job search, what if I came across the ad for a nanny for Gina again? Or what if I saw her at the aquarium with another woman? I wouldn’t be able to bear it. I didn’t think much about running into Noah. He made it perfectly clear his job was his priority, so unless I went to his building looking for him, I knew I’d never have to run into him.
I went out into the hallway and saw Mom was at the counter, her back facing mine.
“Morning,” I said.
“Morning,” she returned, not turning around to see me.
“Did you make coffee?” I asked.
“Working on it,” she said.
I plopped my head down on my arms resting on the table.
“You tired, love? You slept in.”
“I could have slept longer.”