“Okay, as long as you’re as sure as you seem. Then what happened?”
We talked until the sun was setting through her bay window, bathing the room in soft light.
“I should go; it’s been a long day.” I stretched my stiff limbs and carried my mug to the cluttered sink.
Heather might have cleaned up, but she was still a long way from her usual, orderly self as the exam grew closer.
“That it has. Drive safe, babe. We’ll talk tomorrow. Try and talk to your mystery man, okay? I hate seeing you like this. Maybe there’s a reasonable explanation.”
There was.
He’d realized that I was just not worth his time. I’m not insecure. I never have been. I was attractive, but James was top-tier supermodel hot. Not only that, he was witty, intelligent, and easy to be around.
Even if he was looking to settle down, which he definitely wasn’t, it wasn’t going to be with a girl like me.
Heather’s words echoed around in my head as I drove home. She was right, to a certain extent anyway. If he was done with me, the least he could do was tell me. My heart stammered at the thought, but finding out sooner was better than later.
I had gone into this thing with my eyes wide open and my heart completely shut. Somehow, he’d taken a crowbar to the layer of protection I had surrounded myself with, and I’d forgotten that he was a fun distraction that my dad would hate.
I had known that James was trouble. It was the very reason I’d said yes to dinner in the first place, but it seemed that I was the one in trouble now that trouble didn’t want to get into me anymore.
On a whim, I decided to call him. I deserved to hear him say that he was over whatever was going on between us. I deserved the truth, even if I was expecting that my call would go to voicemail.
“Gabbi?” he answered on practically the first ring. “Are you okay?”
Concern colored his voice, even over the din of voices in the background. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m on the way home from Heather’s.”
“Oh, okay.” He sounded puzzled. Like he couldn’t figure out why I was calling then.
“I, uh, I was thinking that we should probably talk.” A shout of female laughter came from his end, until a rumbling male voice interfered, and the female voice disappeared with it.
I was not the kind of girl who got jealous. The way I figured it, if the guy was invested in you enough, there was nothing to be jealous about. If he wasn’t, well, good riddance. Let the next skank deal with him.
Yet, the thought of James with another girl sent jealousy coursing through my veins. The thought of another girl putting her hands on him, feeling the power flexing beneath the surface, I couldn’t stand it.
“Yeah, I guess that we should.” There was no emotion in his voice. In fact, it was the same low, arrogant lilt that he’d used the first few times we’d talked.
“Tell me where you are. I’ll meet you there.” I looked like shit, but I could clean up quickly once I got home. I’d made up my mind, and I needed him to rip the Band-Aid off.
As much as it would sting and hurt, I wasn’t going to endure another week of whatever he was doing.
“I’m busy tonight. I can’t leave now, and it’s probably not a great idea for you to come here. Most of the team are at this party. How’s tomorrow for you?” His voice was quiet, distracted.
“Okay, fine. Tomorrow then.” I wasn’t about to go strolling into some party where my dad probably had a million eyes and ears. It would be suicide. Even without anyone finding out about James and me, my presence at a party like that would raise eyebrows.
I wasn’t sure that I cared about my dad finding out anymore, but James and Harper? I wasn’t about to risk it when their futures were at play. I could wait one more day for an answer.
He hesitated. “I’ll come to your place around 9?”
“Fine, but let me ask you something, James. Is there anything going on between us? Because if there isn’t, I need to know.” It was as out there as I’d put myself in years, maybe even ever.
“Let’s talk tomorrow, okay?”
Chapter Twenty-One
James
Ryder’s guest bedroom was empty except for me when I woke up that morning. I’d physically locked the door after I’d removed the third prospect from the bed.