“I’ve never been fond of the whole talking about your problems thing,” I said.
“Well, you need to get over that. If you’re serious about your sobriety, you’ll suck it up and do whatever it takes.”
“Thanks, guys,” I said as I sat back down.
That was exactly why I loved coming to my AA meetings. They were becoming friends who always had the best advice for staying on the right path. Kaitlin couldn’t give me the advice I needed sometimes because she hadn’t struggled with addiction like I had. She meant well and I know she tried, but someone who hadn’t truly struggled with an addiction had a hard time understanding how totally consuming it could be.
After my meeting, I always felt even more committed to my sobriety and energized for the next few days. I was so glad I had the support I did in my life. It was one of the things that helped me be so compassionate towards the people at Paradise Peak. Having a good support system was one of the most important things for anyone to stay sober. I firmly believed that.
Just as I had made it to my car and was about to head home, my cell phone rang. I contemplated not answering it when I saw that it was work. Tomorrow was supposed to be my day off, but the only reason work would be calling me was because someone had called in sick.
It was amazing to me how many sick days some of my coworkers took. What was more amazing was that they still had jobs, but then again, there weren’t all that many regulars that lived in Aspen and weren’t working on the ski slopes or in the stores during the winter; Mr. March probably couldn’t fire people because he needed the staff so much.
“Hello,” I said as I winced in anticipation of what Mr. March was going to say.
“Can you work tomorrow?” Mr. March asked without any preamble to his request.
“Nope, I’m relaxing tomorrow. I’ve worked the last seven days. Remember?”
“Cassidy, there’s no one else.”
“Why can’t Adam work?”
“His grandmother died.”
“His grandmother died six months ago. He’s using that excuse again?” I exclaimed.
I was just giving Mr. March a hard time. I was going to work. Overtime pay was time and a half and it was almost Christmas, so I liked to get a little extra cash for buying my friends and family presents.
Buying things had become my new addiction. There was always something that replaced the old one. Some people got into working out all the time. Some people started hobbies. Others had affairs or got wrapped up in whole sex thing. I figured my little shopping addiction was pretty safe.
“I don’t know. Maybe this is another grandmother.”
“It’s fine, I’ll work. Is Kaitlin on my unit tomorrow?”
“No, she’s needed on the secure unit.”
Ugh. I hated working with the other nurses, but I knew Kaitlin had to work the secure unit more than mine. The secure unit was where patients who were suicidal normally stayed. Although we had suicidal precautions throughout the facility, the secure unit had patients who had so many mental health issues that they couldn’t be trusted to keep themselves safe as they went through detox and treatment.
We contracted with the state for patients on that unit and sometimes took patients who had insurance, as well. It was almost always full and most of our seasoned staff worked over there. I personally didn’t work over there much because I didn’t have a license as a therapist or a nurse, so only when we had a lot of patients did they have room for me.
“Fine, but I’m not coming in before eight.”
“That’s perfect. Thanks, Cassidy.”
I groaned as I hung up the phone. My plans for sleeping in and relaxing had totally been ruined. But at least I’d get to earn some extra cash. I liked my work, and I mostly liked the people I worked with. My co-workers were my friends and the only people besides Kaitlin and my parents that I usually spent time with.
Well, and the patients at Paradise Peak. Some of them had become my friends, too. It was unusual for a doctor, therapist, or nurse to become friends with patients. And they probably had a lot of rules around their relationships, but I was assigned to talk to the patients. My job was to spend time with them and let them talk to me and work through their issues. I had to play board games, help them with their daily tasks – I was their friend in the facility and often kept in touch with them after they left.
It was kind of cool to have people I knew that were celebrities or singers, and wealthy. Most of our friendships died off over the months after they left, but there were still a few people who I kept in touch with over social media.
Then I remembered that the new guy would be there. The utter embarrassment I had when he overheard my conversation with Kaitlin wasn’t anything I wanted to relive. He was a cocky jerk who seemed a little too full of himself and not at all humbled by being admitted to our facility. It wasn’t my ideal patient, but I could make it work out.
But then again, he probably wouldn’t last long and I would only have to deal with him for a few days. Guys like him tended to give up when things got hard. And getting sober was harder than I had ever imagined it would be. They came to our facility thinking that it would be easy to give up all their drugs and alcohol. But nothing in life is easy.
If you are used to drinking or using when your emotions flare up, then when you take those substances away, your emotions have to be dealt with. This was where the true treatment started. Learning how to deal with all your feelings when you didn’t have a substance to dull them was the hardest part about being sober.
Certainly, I could put up with the guy for a few days until he decided to give up and go back to his old life. I remembered the first few days of my treatment. I had actually tried to leave the hospital on several occasions, but luckily, a sweet nurse had talked me into staying.