“It isn’t enough, and you know it. He didn’t say he killed her. You need to think clearly, or your emotions will fuck this up.”
“I don’t fucking have emotions,” I sneered, clenching my fists until my nails dug into my palm.
“You have the kind that kill, Jaxon. All of us do. It is what makes us dangerous men, but if you lose it, he will win. He won already once before, don’t let it happen again.”
I shrugged his hand off me and scrubbed my hands over my face. He was right. I couldn’t let Brian get to me. I had to think smarter. He would bring Tracy up to dent my armor, and even though it worked, he didn’t have to see that. “You’re right. You’re right,” I relented. “Gas them, both. I want them unconscious when we bring them into the mountain.”
“There’s something you don’t hear every day,” Sebastian mumbled and pressed the orange button that released a safe, but effective gas through the vents in their rooms. They wouldn’t know. They would just fall peacefully asleep.
“You boys want some?” Ingrid opened the door to the security room, way too at home for someone we didn’t have a background check on yet and held out a joint. “It’s good shit.”
“Where the hell did you get that? You can’t smoke on a plane,” I ripped it from her fingers and flicked it into Sebastian’s water.
“I was drinking that,” he sighed, picking up the cup to stare into it.
“It was in my purse. I’m old, not dead. Loosen up. Don’t make me regret hopping on this plane.” Ingrid, the woman I thought was sweet and precious, flipped me off and shut the door, leaving it smelling like a skunk.
I despised the smell of marijuana.
“I’m going to have to send her back,” I said, rubbing my temples. I always bit off more than I could chew. I never admitted it though.
“No way! You can’t. She’s awesome. Please, can we keep her?” Sebastian pouted and held his hands together as one big fist under his chin as he begged.
“Jesus Christ,” I said right before the tires hit the runway. I swayed and bounced as Louis brought the plane to a stop. “I’ll think about it. I thought she was a sweet old lady that wanted adventure. I have a soft spot for old people.” I pointed a finger at him. “Don’t tell a soul I have a soft spot.”
He snorted and zipped his lips shut, throwing away the key.
I narrowed my eyes at him and unbuckled my seatbelt. I stared into the monitor again, seeing Brian asleep. I could kill him. End all of this. Move on with my damn life, but I needed the truth. I needed Quinn to believe me.
My end goal was for her to see that I wasn’t the monster in this story, in her story, and maybe any hate she had for me she could let go. I wasn’t a fool to think I had any chance with her. Our love died a long time ago, but if I could make her see I wouldn’t kill someone I love, then others could see it too.
None of the Underground Kings could show our faces in public. All our fiasco’s made national news, and everyone had an idea of who we were. The stares I could deal with, the whispering I c
ould handle, but the fact that it was all a lie. I refused to live my life under a bed of lies.
Maybe then, I’d be able to show my face without shame.
I was a man who carried a lot of burdens. I shouldn’t care what people think, and while a part of me doesn’t, there was a sliver of me that did. I believed that if someone said they didn’t care what people thought, I’d call them a liar.
Society was the fuel to a person’s life. To do better, be better, and live better than anyone else. To make the world your kingdom, and a kingdom wouldn’t exist without competition.
When the plane came to a stop, I stood and hurried out of the room to get to my suite. As I walked down the aisle where the tan leather booth seats sat along the right and left and minibar equidistant from the front of the plane to the back. Everything was beige, gold, and white, with pops of black. I liked minimalist color. The only power that needed to be in the room was mine, not anything else.
I took a right down a narrow hallway and came to my bedroom door. It had a gold handle, and right behind it was a woman that could have been there for me when I needed her most. Her lack of faith in me was the thing that hurt most over the years. She should have known I would have never killed Tracy, but instead of staying by my side, she was instantly afraid of me.
It still fucked me up that she abandoned me so quickly. She was always better than me. A trust fund girl and a criminal on the wrong side of the tracks didn’t live happily ever after. She saw what she wanted to finally see— a man destined for failure.
I laid my forehead on the door and did my best to compose myself. I was strong, but my greatest weakness was beyond this door. I knew it. And I didn’t care how long it took to convince myself, this plan had to be about me, and if I told myself enough, I’d finally believe it.
The knob twisted under my palm as the jet engines hum became lower and lower until they finally shut up. I cracked open the door, and my shampoo lingered in the air, rosemary, and tea tree oil. It relaxed me while I showered, and besides sex, I didn’t have many things in life that relaxed me.
I stepped forward, and my shoes gave under the soft carpet. The four-post canopy bed sat in the middle of the room, and I saw a figure lying on my side of the mattress where I usually slept. My hand gripped the wood, the soft mosquito netting acted as a barrier to keep skin from touching the wood, and when I was on the right side of the bed, I parted the sheer curtain.
My damned heart beat so hard I thought it was about to leap out of my chest when I saw her lying there. Her blonde hair fanned across the silk tan pillowcases, and she clutched the black shirt to her chest, showing the delicate curve of her breast from the side. The skin was so flawless, and it looked softer than the silk that made the sheets.
The gas that came through the vents must have interrupted her while she changed. I leaned down and caged her head between my arms, the bed giving under my weight as I stared. She was sleeping beauty. I wanted nothing more than to lay my lips against her, but true love’s kiss didn’t come from a villain, and I was no prince charming.
She had a bit of venom in her veins too. She could fool everyone, but she couldn’t fool me. There was a darkness inside that yearned for me, and I had a feeling she gave up on me so easily because I brought it out of her.