Prologue
Lucy
There were a million things I thought I would never see or do. Space? I was a secretary, not an astronaut. President of the United States? My career trajectory didn’t go that high. I couldn’t even go a single day without using my hands to count. It was a bad habit I was scolded for when I was a child but never managed to overcome it.
Those were reasonable expectations and limitations.
It was just life. It was how it was. Logical, just like me.
What I never thought I’d see— something completely illogical— was my boyfriend of ten years holding another woman in his arms.
In. My. Bed.
The same bed we slept together in every single night since college. He didn’t even see me. I stood in the doorway, holding take-out in my hand from our favorite diner and a bottle of wine, watching him fuck her in a way he never fucked me. Hard, hand around her throat, and plowing into her like he wasn’t worried about causing her pain. My eyes were glued to him, unable to look away from the scene in front of me. It was like a car wreck. I knew I should look away, but the shock made me wonder if what I saw was real.
The girl was a brunette, of course. He always made comments about that—like I should change my hair color at his whim because we were together. I never thought it was a deal breaker.
Our bed smacked against the wall, and both of them were grunting like wild animals. He had sweat on his back, so they had been going at it for a while now. Why did I notice that? It was the last thing I should have been focused on.
“Fuck yeah, you like that, bitch?” He sneered at her, and I flinched because I never wanted to be spoken to like that.
She seemed to love it because she leaned up on her forearms and bit his lips.
“Yes, Daddy. Just like that. Harder. More!” She groaned like she was in the middle of a porn movie. Her pleasure didn’t even sound real.
And Daddy? I would have called him that—if he asked. Hearing it on her lips sent a shiver of disgust through me. The bottle of wine dropped from my hand, and it landed on the floor; the sound of it shattering didn’t even break the shocked daze I found myself in. Red wine soaked my feet, and the dark green glass flew everywhere. It almost cut my feet. I don’t even know if I would have noticed it if it did.
“Oh my god! Brian!” The porn star in my bed pushed my boyfriend off and covered herself up with my blanket.
Brian’s head snapped in my direction, and the color drained from his face as he pulled out of her, his cock wet, and rolled off the bed. “Lucy! I can explain, okay? Baby, listen—”
“Baby!?” The sex doll gave him a confused stare. “You said you were single!”
“I’d offer to introduce myself, but I know exactly where your hand has been. I’m Lucy. Brian’s girlfriend of ten years.”
“Ten…” Her eyes rounded, and her hand flies to her mouth. “I didn’t know. I’m sorry!”
She started to cry, big messy tears, and the only thing I could think about was how I needed to change the sheets again. Actually, I’d burn them.
“She’s nothing, baby. I promise. Listen to me,” Brian wrapped the sheet around his waist and walked around the bed, his cock was hard, and I could see through the white sheet that he wasn’t wearing a condom with this girl. “Janette,” he turned to the girl he had been having sex with. “Wait.” He tried to keep her from leaving by reaching out to her, but she got out of bed and bent down for her clothes.
His attempt to grab her arm resulted in her yanking it away. “You’re an asshole,” she said, tugging on her shirt. She had tears in her eyes, but it didn’t exactly break my heart.
I was obviously in shock. Still trying to process what I was seeing. The fact that he was in our bed with another woman—not even bothering to use protection.
“I can’t believe you. You liar! I don’t mean anything? After you’ve been fucking me for six months, Brian. Six!”
Having sex without protection was our thing. We were each other’s first. We were supposed to be each other’s last.