"Tell me," he said one last time, and I partially gave him what he wanted to hear.
"I love the way we make love."
That was all he was getting.
Kova reached between us and pinched my clit so hard I screamed as he drove into me from behind. He used his strength to shove me down on his dick as loud moans purred from my throat. The pleasure was too much and I closed my eyes and let myself fall. Silver stars danced behind my eyelids as he tightened his grip. My breathing took on a sound of its own, and my body rode his wave until the pleasure subsided and we slowed down.
Our heavy breathing was the only sound in the room. Kova pulled his cock out with a little pop and leaned back against the arm rest of the couch, taking me with him. I glanced down between us, his length semi-hard and glossy with our abandoned cravings. A thin white line oozed from his tip and stuck to my inner thigh. His hand flattened against my entrance and I looked over my shoulder at him quizzically.
"Squeeze. I can feel my cum trying to leak out of you." He covered my tender vagina with his hand to hold it in. He was so filthy, but I loved that about him. "Leave it where it belongs." I nodded, trying to catch my breath, feeling it trying to pour out of me.
Turning over, I got up to face him and sank down on his lap. Kova grabbed my face and kissed me passionately and tenderly, something I’d noticed he did each time after we had sex. This was his way of showing me affection, I thought. He pulled back and I smiled. We both looked between us. His penis hung over his elastic waistband looking completely used, and I could see my clit as his cum leaked out of me onto his shaft. My teeth dug into my bottom lip as I moved my pussy over his length, rubbing his thick white pleasure on his cock. I lifted my eyes to study Kova. He was watching us intently.
I leaned forward to push his head back so I could press my lips to his neck, I slid my tender pussy over him. Kova growled and I felt it against my lips.
"Go ahead and come on me like this, Ria, I know you want to."
And I did. I rubbed our desires all over him until I was trying to squeeze his dick with my pussy lips and came again.
"God," I said breathless once I was done. I sat up feeling a little light-headed. My eyes were wide with surprise. "I don't know what comes over me when I'm with you. I feel like I turn into another person and all I can focus on is sex."
Kova grinned then kissed me hard. He stuffed his penis back into his pants and then dropped to his knees. Grabbing my hips, he placed a soft kiss to my mound and lifted one leg and placed it over his shoulder. I watched, curious to see what he was going to do when his bottom teeth gradually danced over my clit. I shuddered, a current of euphoria slaying through me. My fingers threaded his tousled locks and I raised my hips, rocking into his face while he teased me some more. If he wanted to give me more, fine by me. Kova flattened his tongue and pressed it against my sex and I almost came again. It was raw and dirty, but truth be told, I loved that he was tasting us.
"I love your pussy," he said like he was on cloud nine.
I felt a thick, slippery gooeyness trail down my ass onto the couch. I looked down and watched two of Kova's fingers wipe it up then push it back into me. He stroked the tender walls of my pussy with a softness that didn't quite match his rough exterior, massaging his semen into me. Kova's carnal desires resonated within me. I understood where he was coming from because I was just like him.
Kova looked up at me. Our eyes connected and something in my heart shifted into place. Each day he was mending what he broke inside of me. His vulnerability was back, defenses were down, and I saw the love he had for me. Not from the orgasms he gave, but from the way his distressed eyes stared into mine, the way his face contorted with agony and yearning. He dropped his forehead to my stomach and his shoulders bunched tight. He expelled a breath and then wrapped his arms around my waist and held me, releasing whatever pent-up emotion he had.
And I took it. I took all of it all, feeling the weight of his body and absorbing it deep into my bones. It was strange how I felt him more through touch than his words. I understood him. But sometimes when he looked at me, and how his body sank into mine, how he trembled beneath the su
rface, it was the only answer I needed.
Moving to my knees, I embraced this man who was so tormented by his feelings and actions. I wanted to tell him I loved him. I had too much empathy for him, and I didn't know how to close that gate to make it stop from happening, because the reality was, I’d unlocked the door and held it open for him to begin with.
“Promise me,” I said softly. He nodded.
Kova was right. This wasn't normal, but it was our normal…and I was okay with that.
Forty-One
Kova molded back into his old self with each passing day, and within weeks I was greeted daily with his cocky brashness I'd come to know and love.
I never realized how much my mental health relied on his coaching and what we accomplished in the gym, because despite the fatigue and bone aches, I was doing better than ever. I took all my medicine, I didn't miss my scheduled blood work, and I actually slept. I was even eating a little better. I hadn't gained weight, but I felt alive and I knew it was because I had rekindled my relationship with Kova.
I still didn't have a donor match. That was one thing he couldn't do for me.
We were both trying so hard to find the right medium to make things work. Inside the gym, we picked up where we left off and practiced my routines for hours each day, breaking down the skills and practicing to perfection. Wash, rinse, repeat. We were completely civil to one another and back to business. I ate up his words. My first, huge international meet was coming up, then one more competition a couple of weeks after that where the selection for the Olympic team took place.
This was it. The moments I'd been waiting for were finally here.
As the day drew to an end and practice was just about over, I caught a flutter of neon pink in the corner of my eye. I glanced over at a face I hadn't seen in many long months. Bright blue globes for eyes, a giant smile from ear to ear that I felt down to my soul, and platinum blonde hair and pinks tips she'd dyed.
Avery Heron. My best friend. Was at World Cup.
Excitement I hadn't felt in ages whooshed through me. My face lit up and I bounced on my toes eagerly. I wanted to run to her, throw my arms around her neck, but I couldn't just leave in the middle of practice, not even to take a break—I needed permission.
I searched for Kova, and he saw my silent plea. He nodded his head with a kind smile. I ran. Maybe opening up about Avery to him had been a blessing in disguise.