Hold On to Me

“You didn’t happen to tell anyone that you were leaving, did you?”

John shook his head. “No, why?”

“Oh, it’s nothing … only that I know Ford called and Alyssa stopped by one day. She looked like she’d been crying, her eyes were nearly bloodshot and her nose was all red. When we told her where you’d gone, she looked about ready to crumble to the floor. She turned around and left after that.” Clark paused. “I’m thinking you should’ve told your friends.”

“You’re right, I should have, but I wasn’t in the right frame of mind at the time, pops. I did what I could.”

“I understand, son. Sometimes we do what we have to and live with the repercussions.”

John nodded in agreement. “I’ll take care of it. I’ll see you in a little while.”

There was nothing like running. It freed his mind and released endorphins. It was a huge stress reliever. John felt impervious as he pumped his legs down the dirt road with nothing surrounding him but the wind at his back and the trees on the side of the road. God, he loved Georgia. South Fork might be a little hole in the wall town that didn’t show up on a map, but it was his home. He loved the simplicity, the old dirt roads, and the land between the houses. He could see why Luke was always coming back. There was nothing like home.

Breathe in, breathe out. Running was the ideal medication for mending a broken heart. During boot camp the recruits were forced to run miles and miles each day, so he had built up a pretty good stamina.

Turning the corner to the next street, John took the long way to Alyssa’s house. Which meant he had to pass Jace’s accident site. He learned to pace himself while running, but nothing could prepare him for the fake white flowers in the distance, or the cutout heart with scalloped edges. His heart began beating feverously against his ribs, tears prickled at his eyes, but he pushed them back. Jace’s death was still fresh and it hurt like hell.

Striding forward, John crossed the street to Jace’s memorial spot. Bending over, he placed his hands on his knees, breathing deeply trying to catch his breath. When he finally did, John tipped his head up slightly and peered through his eyelashes at the bold, block letters in front of him.

DRIVE SAFELY

IN LOVING MEMORY OF

Jace McConnell

Five months later and it still hurt like it was only yesterday that it happened. This was all that was left of Jace.

John took a deep breath and released it as he stood up. Placing a hand over his heart trying to rub away the ache, he said, “Miss ya, man.”

Turning around, John picked up his knees and booked it toward Alyssa’s house.

The burn from running nonstop was just settling in his thighs, but John pushed past it and kept going. As he ran, he thought about what he would say to Alyssa. Would she talk to him? Or would she turn him away for the pain he caused her? He was unsure of what to do because the way he saw it, he fucked up royally. Where did they stand friendship wise?

Rounding the corner to the next street, John squinted his eyes watching long blonde hair blow in the wind. For a minute, he thought it was Alyssa, but that wasn’t Alyssa’s house so it couldn’t be her.

It was Ben’s.

John kicked his legs harder, ignoring the blaze of heat running through him. The closer he got, John was beginning to think it really was Alyssa. But what was she doing at Ben’s house? It looked just like her from her pale legs to her light as white blonde hair. And when she closed the door to the mailbox and turned, she brushed a piece of hair away from her face as she flipped through the mail. John’s legs slowed at their own accord when she picked up her head.

It was Alyssa.

… And she was pregnant? That can’t be possible. Surely she would’ve told him she was pregnant, right?

No.

John must be seeing things or the heat was getting to him because there was no way she was pregnant.

Pregnant? He kept repeating the word in his head. Her eyes were huge, wide blue circles as she watched him close the distance. She looked shocked, as if she seen a ghost. She pressed the mail to her chest with her mouth slightly open. John ran his eyes the length of her body. There was no way she gained weight in the past five months only in her stomach and not in her legs. She noticed his gaze and wrapped a protective arm around her belly, pursing her lips together. As if he would do anything to hurt her?

Alyssa was pregnant with his baby.

This wasn’t something he was expecting in a million years to come home to. How did he start a conversation now? He couldn’t, especially with the worried and startled look in her eyes. She was breathing heavily, her chest rising up and down fast. And yet, she still looked so beautiful to him.

Instead of saying anything, he dropped to his knees so he was eye level with her baby bump. She drew in an audible breath. Carefully, he brought his hands to her stomach and gently placed them on the sides of her growing belly. His child was growing inside of her.

He was going to be a father.

Glancing up, Alyssa’s teeth were digging into her bottom lip. Unshed tears were about to spill over. “Can I touch your belly?” John asked softly.