He chuckled and cleared his throat nervously. “I would if I didn’t have a girl.”
I blinked. “What? You don’t have a girl.”
He cleared his throat again. “I haven’t told you guys till now because I wanted to make sure, you know?”
“You’re serious,” Cameron commented.
“Yeah
. Been living with her for two months now.”
I had managed to move Red to the back of my mind, but Amos’s confession brought her straight to the front row. I grunted in answer, waiting for him to tell me more.
“Driving me fucking crazy,” he mumbled after a moment, his face looking tortured. “I can’t figure out what the hell she wants. What’s going on in a girl’s head, anyway? Seriously I want to know.”
Ditto, I thought. “What’s wrong?”
His eyebrows shot up. “That’s what I asked her. She said nothing. But obviously there’s something. I asked her if she’s okay, and she said everything was fine. So I thought okay, maybe she wants some space. So I told her I was going to see you guys tonight, and she said, Fine, have fun! But she didn’t sound like she meant it. She sounded like she wanted to chop my balls off. What the fuck is wrong with her? She’s driving me nuts.”
I handed him another bottle. “Here, drink more beer.”
“Thanks.” He popped the top open and guzzled like he hadn’t drunk in a week. After burping like a train, he continued. “Then I asked what she wanted for her birthday, and she said she didn’t want anything. I kept asking her what she wanted, but she said not to give her anything. So I didn’t.” His face mirrored bafflement. “She didn’t talk to me for a week. What the hell?”
Poor guy. Even I knew about that one. You should always give someone a birthday present no matter what they said.
“Have some Doritos.” Cameron handed him a bag.
Amos opened the bag, munching chips like a monkey. “Why doesn’t she just tell me what she really wants? I’m not a fucking psychic.”
I nodded. “It’s a trap, dude. It’s the same as when they ask you if they look fat in a dress, or if you think their friend is pretty.”
Cameron laughed. “Or what shade of color is on the wall.”
“Huh?”
Cameron shrugged. “Nothing.”
“Shit.” Amos hissed, looking frustrated. “Do you know how long I have to wait when she gets ready? She says five minutes, and five minutes in girl language could be half hour to an hour. I’m not joking, dude. What the hell do they do?”
“It’s a mystery,” Cameron replied, a small smile on his face.
Red didn’t take two hours to get ready, I thought, remembering our first real date last night. Less than half an hour, and she was done. I was pretty lucky.
Amos nodded and let out a huge breath. “But damn, I’m crazy about this girl.”
I know how you feel, I thought.
“I love her hair. It’s down to her ass,” Amos continued. “Sexy as hell, but she sheds hair more than my dog does.”
I laughed. I’d found a strand of hair on the couch that could only be Red’s. I remembered picking it up and placing it between the pages of my book.
God, I’m such a creep.
Four hours later, I’d lost count of how many bottles I’d finished and was feeling drunk. Red had moved to the back of my mind again. Thank God. The other guys had joined us, throwing around insults and fake sex stories to make them look good.
“Hey, baby, come back for more?” Justin slapped a girl’s butt as she walked past him. I thought I’d seen her with him earlier.
“Hey!” She slapped him in the face. “Asshole.”