I got it. They had a lot of memories together. They were close. They had a bond.
But more importantly, Caleb named people colors that he associated with them. It wasn’t just me. It wasn’t our thing. My heart fell into my stomach.
“I’m so sorry, Veronica. I didn’t mean to…” Beatrice-Rose laid her hand softly on my arm, a sign of comfort, as if we’d been friends for a long time. Maybe she just liked to touch people. But I didn’t like being touched by strangers. It wasn’t my thing. I stepped away.
“It’s just that…I haven’t seen Caleb in months,” she said. “I’ve been away, in Paris. And he’s family. I don’t…really have much family.”
I heard the genuine sadness in her voice. I felt bad. I shouldn’t have judged her so quickly. She and Caleb must be really close, and she must have missed him a lot.
But there was something there… I knew it wasn’t just sisterly affection she felt for him. She liked Caleb as more than a friend. I could see it in the way her eyes lingered on his face, the way her hands stayed on his body. I knew, as only a girl would, that she had feelings for Caleb.
“You ladies want to hang out on the balcony or in the living room?” Caleb asked, but he was only looking at me. I didn’t answer.
“Living room is fine,” Beatrice-Rose answered, walking ahead of us. “Dinner will be here in ten. I ordered our usual.” She grinned, kissing her palm and blowing it in Caleb’s direction.
“Perfect.”
Our usual.
Just how many times had she stayed over here to have a usual? And how close were they? Were they…together before? Oh God, what if they were? This was so awkward. And if they were, why hadn’t Caleb told me? I hated these thoughts. This was why I didn’t want to get close to a guy.
Jealousy.
Such an ugly feeling. I hated it. I hated Caleb for making me feel it.
He pulled me on the couch beside him as he chatted with Beatrice-Rose. I asked them if they wanted drinks, and they both refused. She talked about her trip to Paris, how she had to go back this summer because her best friend was getting married there.
Paris. Someday, I promised myself, I’d go there too. I would love to go around the world.
With Caleb, my subconscious whispered. Again, I ignored it.
She went down memory lane with him, asking if he remembered that time when they went camping and he had to carry her back to camp because she’d sprained her ankle. Or those times he gave her peanut butter sandwiches. With no jelly. Her voice just held a hint of disgust. I loved peanut butter sandwiches. And yes, with no jelly. Those were my favorite. But I didn’t tell her that.
What was I doing here? They didn’t need me here to keep them entertained; it looked like they were having a lot of fun talking by themselves. I should leave. Suddenly, I felt Caleb reach for my hand, squeezing it gently. My eyes flicked up at him, but he was still talking and laughing with her. He squeezed my hand again.
A feeling of warmth settled in my chest. I smiled. Somehow he knew when I needed comfort. I was still anxious, but his hand in mine served as a Band-Aid to all of it. He was my Band-Aid. I noticed that Beatrice-Rose looked at our joined hands, then quickly pulled her gaze away.
When the intercom buzzed, Caleb got up. “Finally. I’m starving!”
Beatrice-Rose chuckled, shaking her head so her hair swayed with the movement. “You’re always starving.”
“Yes, I am.” He leaned forward and gave me a quick kiss on the mouth. “Starving for Red.”
Chapter Twenty-nine
Veronica
“Starving for Red,” he whispered beside my ear, then stepped away to answer the door.
I turned red. I knew he said it loud enough for Beatrice-Rose to hear. My face grew hot and I felt giddy, like something was tickling my stomach.
“He’s like a kid, isn’t he?” Beatrice-Rose motioned with her chin to where Caleb was chatting with the delivery guy. Caleb was saying something that made the guy guffaw.
She toyed with the pendant on a chain around her neck. “God. I missed him so much,” she whispered so quietly that I almost didn’t hear it. But I did.
Her eyes widened, as if she couldn’t believe she’d just said those words. “I’m so silly.” She let out an embarrassed laugh. “I’m so sorry, Veronica. I was thinking out loud.” She lowered her eyes, and I could see two pink spots on her cheeks.
It hurt to look at her. She was like a double punch to my already sore bruise. She was beautiful and rich, and had a history with Caleb. And she was obviously in love with him. Was Caleb in love with her too?