“I can’t.”
“Jameson,” I whisper through gritted teeth. “Meet me, or else prepare to bail me out of prison tonight for killing a minor.”
“What?”
“That kid.” I pinch the bridge of my nose, unable to believe it. “He put sugar in the gas tank of my Aston Martin.”
“What?”
“Oh, it gets better. He also put hair-removal cream in my fucking conditioner bottle.”
“He did not.”
“Jameson,” I whisper angrily. “My hair looks like singed pubes, so you either take me to a fucking bar, or that’s it . . . I’m going crazy.” My eyes nearly bulge out of their sockets. “And I won’t be held responsible for my actions,” I snap.
He bursts out laughing. “Are you fucking serious right now?”
“Deadly.”
“Jesus Christ, Tris. Who is this fucking kid?”
“Someone on my hit list. See you in ten.” I hang up and look in the mirror at my fuzzy hair. I try to part it and push it to the side, but it’s all fuzzy and sticking up on end.
I make a fist at the mirror. “When I get ahold of you, kid . . .” I storm out and grab my bag. I take out my toiletry bag and throw the entire thing in the trash.
Who knows what that fucker has done?
I sip my beer and glare at my infuriating brother across the bar table.
Every time he looks at me, he bursts out laughing. He’s been doing this for half an hour.
I shake my head in disgust. “If I could run my fingers through my hair in dismay, I would. But I can’t . . . because it will fucking fall out.” I sigh deeply. “This is not going to work for me. My hair is an asset,” I splutter. “How will I walk around like this?” I widen my eyes as a vision comes through. “How will I face people in meetings?” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Hi, I’m here to take over your company. Don’t mind me. I got fucked up by a thirteen-year-old.”
Jameson puts his head into his hands and laughs hard. His shoulders and back are racked with giggles.
I sip my beer, unimpressed. “Go ahead; laugh all you want,” I mutter dryly. “This is fucking hilarious.”
?
?It actually is,” he says with a laugh. “I would say hysterical.”
I glare at him, and when he finally stops laughing and comes back to earth, he says, “In all seriousness, what are you going to do?”
“Well, I want to go over there and rip him a new asshole.”
He laughs again.
“But I won’t, because Claire will kick me out.”
“And that’s a problem?”
“Yes. It’s a fucking problem. This woman has me by the balls,” I whisper angrily. “You know what I’m doing tonight?”
“What?”
“Unbeknown to Claire, I’m driving an hour to watch movies with her youngest boy . . . who is actually a pretty cool little kid, mind you, but whatever. While I pretend to the other two kids that I am just her friend.”
He frowns.