What next?
At 7:00 p.m. there’s a knock at the door. I get up to open it in a rush.
“I have pizza and beer ready and I am at your service.” Callie smiles as she holds the pizza box in the air.
I hold my hand out for her and kiss her cheek as she walks past me. “Come in.”
She throws the beer and pizza onto my coffee table, looking around with her hands on her hips. “Wow, Tull, the place looks amazing.”
I smile as I look around my new apartment. “I love it here, Cal. It’s closer to everything, and the apartment just feels so homey, you know?”
She walks to the kitchen and takes out some plates before she comes back to the living room and begins to serve us our pizza. “Sorry I couldn’t talk today when you called. My boss is a huge asshole,” she says as she hands my plate over to me. “I’m going to knock him out one of these days.”
I giggle. “That’s okay. I was just calling to have a meltdown, anyway. You dodged a bullet.” I take a bite of my pizza and frown. “Hmm, so good.”
“Tell me what happened. Gym junkie had a ‘roid rage?” she says around a mouthful of pizza.
I nod as I chew. “Completely. Grabbed Rourke, threw him out of the chair, and totally lost his shit.”
“What did he say?”
I crack open my Corona beer and take a sip. “He was carrying on because I wouldn’t answer his calls all week. I told him it was over, and then...” I shake my head in disgust.
“What?” She frowns, falling serious.
“I told him how he made me feel but now I feel kind of stupid about it.”
“No, it’s a good thing. He needed to know the truth,” she assures me. “What did he say once you told him?”
Knock, knock, knock.
“Who’s that?” I mutter.
“It might be him,” Callie teases.
“I fucking hope not.” I answer the door to see Meredith standing in the hallway.
“Hello,” she says, as if annoyed.
“Hi.”
“You didn’t tell me we were meeting up tonight?” She walks past me into my apartment.
Callie frowns at me in question. “Oh my God,” I mouth behind Meredith’s back to Callie as she walks past me.
“Hi, wolfy,” Meredith says to Callie.
Callie stares at Meredith, and then her eyes rise to me in question.
“Callie, this is Meredith.”
Meredith smiles happily and shakes hands with Callie.
“Meredith asked me to be her best friend today,” I say. Get the hint, Callie.
Callie’s eyes flicker between the two of us as she clearly tries to work out the dynamics of what’s going on.
“So, I told her we could all be best friends,” I explain.
Callie fakes a smile. “You did? Fancy that.” She sips her beer.
“Yes.” I stare at Callie as I try to maintain a straight face. “And Meredith thinks we should make a wolf pack now.”
Callie chokes on her beer. “Excuse me,” she whispers through a raspy throat. “A wolf pack?”
I nod and, unable to help it, I giggle. Meredith bounces onto the sofa and smiles happily, crossing her legs in front of her.
If only I could read Callie’s mind. I can’t imagine what she’s thinking, but I know it’d be fucking funny. I need to explain myself a little more.
“Meredith has never had a best friend,” I continue.
Callie’s face falls. “Oh, really?”
“And Meredith’s mum pays her rent for her so she doesn’t listen to her having intercourse anymore.”
Callie’s face falls farther, and I can see her connecting the dots. “Your mum listens to you having sex?” She frowns.
“No.” Meredith shakes her head. “I listen to her having sex.”
We both stare at her as the horrific thought rolls around in our heads.
“She’s good at it, too, because her boyfriend moans loudly,” Meredith adds.
Callie’s eyes are the size of saucers as she tries to make sense of this weird person in front of us.
Manners eventually get the better of her. “Would you like a beer, Meredith?” she asks.
“No, thanks,” Meredith says flatly. “I can’t drink beer. It makes my vagina smell.”
Callie’s eyes widen in horror.
“Yeah, you know sometimes you just think, fuck, this pussy smells,” Meredith says casually.
Callie stares at her, deadpan. “Can’t say that I do.”
I can’t help it; I get the uncontrollable giggles. Who the hell says this shit?
Meredith looks to me. “It’s not funny, Tully. It’s a real hot mess down there. No beer for me. Ask my mum how bad it smells.”
Callie’s face pales, and I can see that she’s getting a really bad visual in her head as she holds her pizza up, mid-air.
I burst out laughing.
Meredith folds her feet up in front of her and smiles broadly as she looks between us. “So, what do my friends want talk about?”
“Anything but your reaction to beer.” Callie sighs as she sips her drink. “Or your mother sniffing it.”