The dress was pulled down over my best assets and since I wasn’t wearing underwear, it certainly gave them a close-up view of my embarrassment. I had nothing to hide. Love had finally found me with cupid’s arrow piercing my heart. I tried to ignore it and I wasn’t even sure if I was going to be able to face it. I could chalk it up to the heat of the moment. I could make him believe the words coming out of my mouth were really a knee jerk reaction to being shot.
I did want to feel what love was and it was not an emotion I was accustomed to. It felt like being separated from him was like losing an extension of my arm. The time we had spent together was like an emotional tug on my heartstrings. I’d never felt anything like it. It made me feel weak and inferior.
“I would say you were either predicting to get shot, or you came prepared. I’m glad to see that somebody left a light on up there. You acted with professionalism and I find myself at a loss for words. You were certainly money well spent, but it was more than that. You have this ability to see things differently and to take me outside of my comfort zone. Not many have been able to surprise me, but you are one of the rare ones that have. You make me feel strong and invincible, but that’s only because you are around me to make me feel like I’m not vulnerable.” It was nice of him to sing my praises, but it wasn’t necessary.
“Knight, you have been a shining beacon in a life of shadows and darkness. I’ve always considered myself to be invincible and broken like a doll. It’s a sharp contrast. Where my body is strong and resilient, my mind is shattered into a million pieces. I take on opponents in the cage because it makes me feel good to beat somebody up. I like the adrenaline rush and I crave the exhilaration of putting somebody down for the count. It pleases me greatly to hear them tap out in anguished cries of pain.” I’d never needed anything like this before and I wasn’t sure what had come over me to make this kind of confession.
“I know that feeling in a different way. I got the same rush from watching you pummel that man into submission. I would love to be in your corner for your next fight. I would understand if you felt it was a distraction.” The ambulance was moving at breakneck speed, breezing through traffic and letting those on the street know they were coming.
“It appears the both of us are built from the same stuff in vastly different ways. I would say that we are both uniquely qualified to be more than just business acquaintances. I’m driven by something I can’t explain. It’s not a cross I bear lightly. My choices and the mistakes I make are mine.” I had been a witness to the perfect crime. There was a blind spot in the alley which I had recognized from the moment I had arrived at the restaurant. I insisted we go in there away from prying. It had put us in danger.
“I don’t even know what to say. Nobody has ever taken a bullet for me. You have touched me more than you can ever know. I hope it will continue for many years to come.” I did my best not to complain, but the pain was quite extensive. I could only hope one day I could hang up the gloves and live normally with the white picket fence. I just didn’t see myself becoming a homemaker with little kids tugging at my apron to get my attention.
“Nobody knows what the future holds, but I don’t want to
face it without you. I’m not one to admit my feelings and I really did believe I had none to get in the way of living my life. You changed things. A part of me wants to slap you.” I was locked away with my feelings my only friend. I was my own worst enemy and standing in the way of my happiness was my own stubbornness.
“I’m not the kind of man that makes plans for the future. I deal with the here and now. It’s not the right way to go about business, but it has worked for me in the past. I do find myself wanting you to stick around. The person responsible for this is still out there and we need to work together to find him before he is able to find me again. I make no guarantees, but I’m trying very hard to think of any reason why this won’t work between us” I wanted somebody real without the necessary baggage weighing him down.
“I’m not suggesting that we spend our whole lives together. I get a queasy stomach every time I think about walking down the aisle in white. There is nothing virginal about me and I wouldn’t want to pretend with god overseeing the proceedings. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. I like you a lot, but marriage has never entered into my vocabulary.” I’d thought about it when I was a child, but that was when I was still living the dream.
“We’ll get you patched up and then we’ll find who did this and make them pay. It’s a strange thing in life when you don’t realize yours dream. Girls have come and gone like a revolving door in my bedroom, but you’re not like them in any way. This feeling I have for you is bigger than the both of us combined.” He hadn’t said the three words and I felt like I would break out in hives if he did.
There was a cost for what I did for a living and it took a toll on my body as well as my mind. I was thinking it over and I knew the killer was not going to rest on his laurels. There was no telling if he would lie low or decide to strike while the iron was hot. What I had done to protect him was by the luck of the Irish. Some would have been too shocked to react, but I was not of that same sentiment.
It felt like god was trying to tell me something and he was making it impossible for me not to hear his words. The good book was much forgotten, but there were still some things in my life that didn’t make any sense without some divine intervention. I had never had a need to put on the bulletproof dress, but for some reason, I felt compelled to put it on. I wasn’t even aware that I was doing it. There were times I wished that I could shut my penthouse mouth and become the wholesome girl any man would love to introduce to their family. It just wasn’t in me to conform.
We arrived at the hospital and he was told to stay outside while they treated the wound. They gave me something for the pain, even though I insisted not to administer any drugs. They couldn’t stop me from screaming and the only way to prevent me from injuring myself was to sedate me.
Chapter nine
“I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to leave. You’re doing this against doctor’s orders and I want you to know there are risks. You may not think it’s serious, but you had a bullet invade your body. It’s something you should take very seriously. If you insist on leaving against my orders then you need to avoid strenuous activity. Rest and drink plenty of fluids. Make sure the bandage is changed twice or three times a day as needed. I’m going to give you a prescription and I want you to fulfill it at the nearest pharmacy.” Dr. Grover was being a bit of a poison pill, but I understood he was just doing his job.
“Don’t worry; I’ll make sure she takes her medication on time. She will be convalescing at my penthouse until she is strong enough to leave on her own accord. I don’t know how to thank you for all the good work you have done over the last couple of days. It can’t be easy with a patient who thinks she knows her body better than a professional.” Knight was giving me the evil eye. I turned a blind eye thinking that they were being way too overprotective.
“I’ve never had a more stubborn patient in my life. You really do have your hands full with this one, Knight. I’ll be sure to add this to the considerable bill that you already have. I know you are good for it. I only surround myself with people that are able to pay considerably for my services. Please, keep me informed of any complications. I will be more than happy to make a house call.” With the kind of money Knight was paying, it was a wonder that he wasn’t going to have around the clock care for me.
“There’s not much you can tell her to make her sit still for any length of time. I find myself wondering if maybe restraints are necessary to keep her from doing something stupid.” The idea of being tied down against my will by anybody but knight would have sent a freezing chill of terror down my spine. Just the thought of being his captive made me want to rage in between the sheets until we emerged in the morning for a necessary smoke.
It was a bad habit and one that I had conquered a few years ago. I’d heard of too many horror stories of patients dying of lung cancer. It seemed like a painful way to end one’s life. It wasn’t easy by any means, but it was worth it to finally get the monkey off my back.
“God help me, but I like her independent spirit and not many can show that kind of moxie. She spits on death and I only wish some of my other patients could fight tooth and nail to survive like she has. The bullet did go clean through, but there were some complications with infection which she was able to fight off with the necessary medication and rest. I know that I can’t police her actions, but she needs to take it easy. Those stitches are some of my finest handiwork. I don’t want her to ruin them.” The Dr. didn’t have to know, but I had a fight in less than two days. There was no way I was going to miss the opportunity to take out the legend herself. She was known as the dragon’s head and her moves were more like a deadly ballet recital.
“I’ll do what I can to keep her off her feet.” We shared a knowing glance with both of us thinking the exact same thing. I could almost see the vision in his head of us twisting in a prone position with the bed rocking back and forth against the wall. Having relations with a client was one of my strict rules to avoid at all cost. I had let him beyond the perimeter of what I considered the safe zone.
“I only want you to take the medication when it’s absolutely necessary. These are very strong and quite addictive. It’s not a road you want to take and I’ve seen some hard luck cases. I don’t see you having that problem. You’ll find a way to endure without taking the drugs. I need to go, but I wanted to stop in to make sure you weren’t giving the nurses a hard time. You have a few of them crying and others reluctant to come into your room without you being properly sedated. I’ve never seen anything quite like it.” I was not comfortable with people taking blood at all hours of the night and day.
“They won’t have to worry about that very much longer. Once you leave here, I’m getting dressed and blowing this place. I’ve been here long enough. You don’t know this about me, but I can’t stand being around sick people. You may claim this place is clean, but we both know the truth. I don’t want to be just another statistic and a reason for you to sweep it under the rug to cover it up.” He was shaking his head in disbelief. The Johnny gown I was wearing fell to my feet before the doors even closed.
“It’s not going to hurt you to stay a couple of more days so they can reevaluate your condition.” I ignored what he said, going to the closet and retrieving my clothing. The dress was a little worse for wear. It would need some alterations. There was also a pair of jeans which Knight was able to procure for me at a local boutique down the street.
“You don’t know anything. This place is a death trap ready to ensnare me and drag me straight to hell. I have no interest in staying here for any longer than necessary. I’m leaving and you can either help or get out of my way. At this point, I couldn’t care less which decision you make.” It was difficult, but I managed to put on the jeans and the sweater. I put on my cowboy boots. It was something in my possession that had not seen the light of day since a Halloween party.
They still fit like a glove and reminded me of how little use I had gotten out of them. I grabbed my gray ski jacket, put
ting it on and shuffling towards the door. The only thing I could think about was escaping the cesspool of germs all around me. I always wore a mask when I went to the hospital to visit anyone.
“I’m going to make it my personal mission to make sure you heal without any interruptions. For the time being, I’m going to stay at home working in my home office. I’m not going out for any other reason than to get a breath of fresh air on the top of the roof. I know what you would say if I were to even mention Home Care. This way, I can take care of you myself. I already know how stubborn you can be and throwing things at me is not going to do you any good.” I was about to object, but he put his hand up for silence like I was a petulant child. He was getting on the last nerve that wasn’t already frayed.