“He tried to rape you?”
“Yeah. That was when it really hit home for me. I’d married a monster. I left with my mother and never went back. But he stalked me for a couple of years, even so.”
She noticed that her hands were shaking. Saying the words had been strange—frightening but liberating as well. It was as if she hadn’t believed that it had happened until she’d said it out loud. Yes, it had happened. She hadn’t imagined it, like Dafydd had tried to persuade her. He was a controlling bastard who would stop at nothing, even rape, to get her where he wanted her.
“Oh God, that’s horrible. Really horrible. Didn’t you go to the police?”
“And charge him with what? Throwing away a pack of pills?”
“Wasn’t he violent, though?”
“No, he never actually hit me. He was too clever for that. He knew how to hurt me, though. He played on all my insecurities, day after day, until my self-esteem shrivelled to nothing.”
“Emotional abuse.”
“Yes, but this was twenty years ago, Lyd. Nobody believed in that kind of thing back then. If a man didn’t beat you black and blue, he wasn’t an abuser. Stalking laws were next to useless too. Thank Christ for him getting that gig in America or I’d still be a nervous wreck today. Probably in some institution or other.”
“Jesus. It’s awful. He can’t come and join our orchestra. Couldn’t we tell the trustees about all this?”
“Oh, come on, Lydia. It’s my word against his, basically. And everyone thinks Dafydd’s a hell of a guy.”
“They got the hell bit right. So, you haven’t told Ben. Are you going to?”
“Oh God, it’s a mess. What can I tell him? Shit, I’m so worried Dafydd will go after him. I just don’t know what he’s going to do.”
“He can’t do anything you don’t want him to,” said Lydia. “If he does, you can report him. I’ll spread the word around the violins.”
“No, don’t. I don’t want the orchestra torn apart by tribe wars. A lot of the violinists are his old friends anyway.”
“Okay, okay. What if I mention it to Karl-Heinz? He’s the conductor. He ought to know about potential personal problems in his crew.”
“Well, mention it if you want. I guess.” Vanessa pushed away her half-drunk coffee. “This is giving me the jitters.”
“I don’t think it’s the coffee, to be fair. And you must tell Ben. He deserves to know. He loves you and cares for you—he’d be gutted if you kept this from him.” She looked up suddenly. “Oh! Does Milan know him?”
“No, it was all before Milan’s time.”
“Well, I’m going to mention it to Karl-Heinz. He’s taking me to a lunchtime concert at St Martin’s tomorrow. I’ll tell him then.”
“Fine.” Vanessa’s phone bleeped and she took it out of her purse, biting her lip when she saw who the text was from. “Oh, it’s Ben. I think I’m going to call him. See if I can go round to his place later.”
“You do that. Let him be kind to you. You need it.”
She wasn’t wrong.
Chapter Five
“I just thought you’d want to know.”
Lydia and von Ritter stepped out of St Martin’s and surveyed the expanse of Trafalgar Square before them, Nelson’s Column rising to the sky in its centre.
“Yes, thank you for telling me,” he said. “I’ll keep my eye on him. You lose one troublesome violinist and you gain another, it seems.”
“I hope you don’t include me in that category. Troublesome violinists.” She smiled up at him, but he looked stern, taking her hand before she could head down the steps.
“Actually, I do,” he said, turning her to face him. “You’re the most troublesome of all.”
“Oh?” Her heart began to bump in its cavity, the combination of mild fear and thrill that kept drawing her towards him. “I thought I was quite innocuous.”