And I also didn’t know how comfortable he was with sleeping anywhere but his own home.
“We’re going to bring out lots of blankets and read stories,” Dayna said.
“That sounds great,” Luke said. “I think I could swing it.”
All three of the kids were very happy to hear it, although Cooper and Chloe were better at hiding their excitement. We got out of the tent and started bringing out plates and silverware to the table on the deck. I lit the candles in the center of the table and before long it looked like the perfect, cozy summer dinner spot.
Dinner was crazy good. Perry never disappointed, but he seemed to have pulled out all the stops for tonight. We had steak with chimichurri, lemon garlic shrimp, roasted potatoes, a good side salad, and plenty of chocolate covered strawberries for dessert.
And Luke sat across from me, every once in a while looking up at me with those bedroom eyes lit by the flickering candles. It was almost as romantic as our date had been the other night, although in an entirely different way. Luke was here with my family. And it was going amazingly well.
It was a feeling I didn’t think I’d be able to have again for years. Maybe ever. The feeling that my house was a home, again.
By the time we finished, I was full and happy and a little tipsy from beer, and all I wanted to do was steal off to some quiet corner and kiss Luke. But instead I was patient, hanging out with the kids on the deck after we’d cleaned up dinner.
At a certain point Rock, Perry, and Luke were inside loading the dishwasher, while Cooper inspected the tent and Chloe was off texting friends. It was just me and Dayna still at the table, and she glanced over to me with a loaded look in her eye.
“Dad,” she said quietly.
“What’s up, pup?”
“You like Luke like you liked Mom, don’t you?”
I froze. It was like I’d had the wind knocked out of me, and suddenly time slowed to a crawl. A thousand possibilities for responses ran through my head, but when I finally spoke, I faltered.
“Huh?”
She shifted on her seat, scratching the back of her head.
“At school Kasey was talking about how you can like boys, or you can like like them,” she continued. “You like like him, right?”
I swallowed hard, trying to remain calm on the exterior. “Luke is a good friend, honey. But I need you to know that no one will ever replace your mom. You know that, right?”
“Replace her?” Dayna said, cocking her head to one side. “Obviously not.”
“Good,” I said. Panic still fluttered around deep in my chest. “You don’t have to worry about Luke, okay?”
“It’s okay, Dad,” she said. “We all really like him.”
Apparently it was possible to feel a warm surge of pride even while you were in stage five major-meltdown panic mode.
“Abby in the Games of Autumn has parents who are divorced,” she said. “And at first she hates it, but then she realizes it’s actually awesome. Because she gets double birthday and Christmas presents, and she has two houses, and gets to have two good families, not just one.”
Now I was swallowing over a tightness in my throat. I definitely wasn’t going to cry just because my kid was talking about a book, but I was already coming close.
“I guess all of that is true,” I said.
“Well, if you do like Luke in that way, it’ll be good, because his backyard is cooler, and we could get to see the greenhouse whenever we wanted. And he knows how to make things, too.”
“C’mere, Dayn,” I said, standing up and covering her in a big hug.
18
Luke
“Evening, beautiful,” Sam said across the bar, nodding at me. “What can I get you?”
“Just a lager,” I said. “You look particularly happy tonight, Sam.”
He grinned as he poured the beer into a cold glass. “I think I’m going to get laid tonight,” he said.
“Who’s the lucky guy?”
“An old friend from elementary school, actually,” Sam said, his eyes going wide. He set down my beer and leaned against the bar, his biceps on full display coming out of his tight black tank top. “He messaged me saying he recently came out as gay, and he’s on this huge journey, blah blah blah.”
“Hey, that isn’t blah blah blah,” I said. “That sounds beautiful.”
“I know, I know,” Sam said, waving a hand. “I’m proud of him, honestly. He’s picking me up at the end of my shift.”
“Congratulations,” I said. “And good luck.”
“Thanks. I’m going to need it.”
Sam practically skipped as he went over to the other side of the bar. I was glad to have him to talk to, anything to distract me after the long work day I’d had.
I’d come here to Red’s Tavern a half an hour earlier than Cam was set to meet me here. Somehow, I still had nervous butterflies in my chest about meeting him. No guy had ever had that effect on me before. I’d already been balls-deep inside him, and yet here I was, glancing at the door every couple of minutes, seeing if he’d arrived.