A while back, when I went and caught feelings for this guy Garrett, that was new territory to discuss with Elijah, but I hadn’t had to straight up hold something back because there had been no reason why I couldn’t like Garrett. And I wasn’t saying that I’d caught feelings for Jonathan the way I had with Garrett, so this whole comparing the two situations needed to stop.
Jonathan was my friend.
My friend whom I wanted to have sex with but couldn’t.
The end.
He’d told me Will knew about our baseball games, so that was new. Will and Jameson wanted to come to a game, so I’d told him that Shaw and Eli did too. It looked like we’d have our own cheering squad, which was cool.
Home with him was…awesome, but tempting. The whole Jonathan-walking-around-in-his-underwear thing became a fixture, and I was definitely a fan. He’d told me he’d wanted me to look the first time, so I didn’t hide when I admired him, and Jonathan didn’t keep himself from showing me he liked it. Not in words, but in the way he held my gaze, the way he smiled or would give me a shy nod. He’d been so locked up sexually for most of his life that I couldn’t help wondering what was inside him, bursting to be freed.
Today was Saturday, and like we basically had since Jonathan moved in, we were planning on spending the evening together. Usually we’d stay in and watch Netflix, and we’d started cooking dinner together too. It was simple meals, neither of us being master chefs or anything, but it was fun doing that kind of thing with Jonathan. Everything hit a little differently when I was with him.
But again, Saturday, and last weekend had been ruined by Mark the homewrecker.
Don’t cook, I texted. I was at work, covering an extra shift. Since Jonathan got off earlier than me, I wanted to make sure we stuck with my plan.
Okay…
Don’t eat.
You’re getting bossy.
I smiled, a goofy sort of smile, and I couldn’t figure out why. It wasn’t as if he’d just cracked some great joke or said anything particularly special. You like it.
Shh. Don’t tell.
Welp, there it went. Smile was now on super megawatt. Fuck my life.
It’ll be our secret *smiley face*
From there I shoved my phone into my pocket because I had a whole lot of blood draws to get through. I was working the ER today, and that was never my favorite. I much preferred being on the floor.
Finally, six rolled around. I gave my report and was out of there. I hurried home, much too excited to be…going home to my roommate, but at least I’d toned down the obsessive grinning.
When I got home, Jonathan was on the couch with his notebook, which he immediately closed up.
“What’s in that damn thing?”
“I don’t know you like that. I’m not sharing my business.”
“Ha-ha,” I replied. “I thought I was your secret-keeper.”
He flinched slightly, which was odd.
I sat beside him. Jonathan didn’t reply, instead plucking at my scrubs, finger brushing my thigh, and it made me feel mushy inside. He wouldn’t have done that with any other guy. I knew it.
“What’s the plan for tonight?” he asked rather than answering my question, but I liked what he’d said. It had become automatic that we would do something together, or maybe he only said that because I’d told him not to eat. That was likely it, but I chose to believe it was the first option.
“They have a movie-in-the-park thing on Friday and Saturday for a couple of weeks. I was going to take you last Saturday, but you had plans, so I thought we could go tonight.”
He made the squinty-eyed face he often did when he was unsure. He had more lines around his eyes than most thirty-two-year-olds, but I figured that was because he’d worked out in the sun his whole life.
“You should have told me.”
“Nah, it was no biggie.” I waved off his concern, stood, and tugged him to his feet. “Up, up, up. We’re going to watch queer movies—did I tell you that part? We’ll sit in the grass, eat food, people-watch, and look at sexy boys.”
Jonathan chuckled. “I’m going, I’m going. See what I mean? Bossy.”
“But you like it,” I said, as we walked together toward the hallway. I thought maybe Jonathan wanted someone to be a little assertive with him.
“I only said that to make you feel better.”
“Lies!” I playfully nudged him toward his room.
“Um-hm. Think what you want. Also, I’m ready, unless there’s something wrong with what I’m wearing.”
Oh, shit. I hadn’t thought of that. I was just thinking I needed to get dressed so he did too. “Nope. You look hot. Come talk to me while I get dressed, then.” Jeans and a tee were his staple, and Jonathan wore them well.