Graham’s business had failed almost immediately—it couldn’t have done anything else with the lack of time and effort he had put into it—and with his parents unable to bail him out he had started borrowing from all and sundry, using his compelling charm and attractiveness to get him what he needed. He had always had the ability to be irresistible when he had put his mind to it.
Kim glanced up suddenly from the task of darning the hole in the pocket of Melody’s school coat.
Irresistible. The word had suddenly switched on a light in her mind and now she understood why she was thinking of Graham after months of being able to shut him out. ‘They all seem to find him irresistible.’ Those were the very words June had used about Lucas.
Kim’s soft mouth straightened into a hard line and her dark brown eyes narrowed unseeingly across the cosy sitting room. ‘They’ all might find Lucas Kane irresistible, but this was one female who had received very powerful antibodies against such a disease, she told herself savagely, acknowledging in the same instant that the little episode in Lucas’s office that morning had bothered her more than she had admitted.
He was the first man who had even remotely stirred her sexual awareness since Graham had died, but now she had recognised the fact and the danger it represented she would be on her guard against herself twenty-four hours a day. It wasn’t that she thought he would be interested in her in a personal way—she almost laughed out loud at the thought of the ruthless and focused Lucas Kane harbouring romantic inclinations towards his secretary—but she didn’t want to be attracted to any man, ever again, and certainly not one cast in Graham’s mould.
She had never told anyone about those last awful twelve months with Graham, the humiliations she had suffered at his hands, and she never would. She didn’t have to. She was answerable to no one and that was the way she liked it. Melody was the only important thing in her life and, thanks to this new job—she couldn’t bring herself to say thanks to Lucas Kane—she was going to be able to give her daughter the kind of lifestyle she hadn’t imagined was remotely in her grasp just a few months ago. And nothing—nothing—must interfere with that.
She nodded sharply to herself, her eyes focusing once more on the small red coat in her hands, and as she set to again with renewed vigour her lips were still drawn uncharacteristically tight.
The next morning there were several inches of snow and the world had been transformed into a winter wonderland, much to Melody’s delight, but the BMW regally ignored such trifles as snow-packed roads and icy conditions.
Once Kim had dropped Melody off and was on her way to work she found herself thinking, as she had done more than once in the last few weeks, how fortunate she was to have such a powerful and comfortable car at her disposal. No more struggling along glassy pavements with wet feet or sitting in a cold bus which had arrived late and was filled with the musty smell of damp humanity.
As usual Lucas was already in his office when she arrived. She had the feeling that if she went into work at five in the morning she would still find him there.
She assumed the routine the hiccup yesterday had interrupted, taking his coffee into him once she had divested herself of her coat and quickly smoothed her hair in her small cloakroom.
‘Good morning, Kim.’ He didn’t raise his head from the report he was studying as he spoke and his voice was polite and cool.
Kim answered in the same vein, placing the tray on the desk and forcing herself to walk smoothly out of the office without allowing her glance to linger on the dark bent head and harshly carved lines of his face, but, annoyingly, she found her heart was beating a tattoo as she sat down in front of her word processor and the hand that raised her coffee to her lips was shaking slightly.
She was glad they had reverted to the businesslike working relationship of the previous weeks, of course she was, she told herself silently. So why did she feel his cool remoteness was almost like a slap across the face? Ridiculous. She nodded irritably to the thought. She was being absolutely ridiculous—it must be the time of the month or something.
She grimaced to herself, drank the coffee in several burningly hot gulps and got down to work.
At five past ten Kim put through a call from the managing director of Clarkson International, and at ten past Lucas put his head round the door. ‘One of those tapes on your desk is a breakdown of the Clarkson contract so far. Concentrate on that first, would you, Kim? I need it for twelve. And we’re lunching with them today at one, by the way, so book a table for four at Fontella’s.’
Kim stared at him, her mind racing. ‘
Do you mean you want me to accompany you?’ she asked politely, her face and voice hiding all signs of agitation.
‘Yes, and you’ll need to bring your notebook and pencil, and get a financial report from Accounts. We might need that.’ He was totally in work mode, his distant voice indicating he was thinking about several things at once. She had noticed that about him before; it was one of the many accomplishments he had that added to the notion he wasn’t quite human.
‘Right.’ She nodded efficiently and then, once the door had closed again, sat staring vacantly across the room. A business lunch with clients, that was all it was. She could handle this. This sort of thing was going to happen time and time again so she might as well get used to it.
The breakdown was on Lucas’s desk at half-past eleven and Kim was waiting—outwardly serene and inwardly disturbed and uptight—at twelve-thirty when he buzzed her to say they were leaving. Her stomach muscles had tightened as the deep dark voice came over the intercom, but when he emerged from his office a few moments later she was all cucumber-cool efficiency.
‘We’re meeting them at Fontella’s so I’d like to get there a few minutes early.’ He took her arm as he spoke, ushering her out of the door with his usual fast, capable way of doing things. She caught a whiff of the expensive aftershave he wore, the feel of his height and breadth all around her as they entered the lift at the end of the corridor, and it was then she carefully moved away and put a little space between them.
‘What’s the matter?’
‘I’m sorry?’ She stared at him as he leant against the carpeted panelling and looked at her quizzically, but she couldn’t stop her cheeks flushing with colour. She had thought her cautious withdrawal had been sufficiently diplomatic and discreet to be unnoticed, but she might have know that razor-sharp brain would have detected it.
‘You didn’t like me touching you,’ he stated evenly, his narrowed eyes like twin points of silver light. ‘Why? Is it me or are you the same with all men?’
Any other man, any other man, might have registered her unease but wouldn’t have confronted her on it. The thought hit Kim at the same time as the hostility at his astute assessment of her, and her voice was icy when she said, in direct answer to the challenge, ‘I don’t like physical contact, as it happens.’
‘I’ll forgo the joke about your daughter being born through immaculate conception,’ he drawled drily, ‘and repeat my question. Do you have a problem with me, Kim? If so, it needs to be brought out into the open and dealt with. I’m not in the habit of jumping on unsuspecting females; neither do I believe in mixing work and pleasure. Is that plain enough for you?’
This was awful, horrific. Kim had never felt so embarrassed in her life. She stared at him and then as the lift glided gently to a halt she saw the gleam in his eyes. It could have been anger, it could have been irritation or a whole host of things, but to her utter humiliation she rather suspected it was dark amusement. And if nothing else it restored her fighting spirit in a way nothing else could have done.
‘I really don’t know what you are talking about,’ she said with painful self-dignity. ‘I merely stated that I don’t like physical contact, that’s all.’
‘I don’t consider taking your arm physical contact in any real meaning of the words.’ It was cool, firm and completely without emotion. ‘So you had better get used to it, okay? I’m not about to watch every movement I make in case I offend you, Kim, so get your head round that and save us both a lot of trouble.’