‘Calm, girl. Calm.’ She spoke out loud before shutting her eyes and breathing in and out deeply a few times. ‘This is just a normal working day. That’s all it is.’
‘Who are you talking to, Mummy?’ Melody had poked her head round the half-open bedroom door and now Kim saw great liqu
id brown eyes surveying her unblinkingly. ‘And why is that big heap of clothes on your bed?’
‘Mummy’s having a sort-out.’
‘Can I take Edward to school to show Kerry and Susan?’ Kim saw the small bear Lucas had bought her was tucked under one pyjama-clad arm where no doubt he’d spent the night. It did not help Kim’s current state of mind an iota.
‘I don’t think so, darling. What if he got lost or dirty?’ Kim said as calmly as she could. ‘Why don’t you put him with all your other cuddly toys and then he’ll be here when you get home tonight?’
Melody considered the suggestion with a tilt of her blonde head. ‘I’ll put him on my pillow,’ she decided firmly, ‘and then all the others will know he’s the boss.’
Kim smiled weakly. It seemed to sum everything up somehow.
Once she had chivvied Melody to have a quick wash and get dressed, Kim nipped downstairs and prepared their breakfast of cereal and toast, before flying upstairs again and reaching for the nearest item of clothing on top of the pile.
She would clear everything away when she got home, she decided feverishly, dressing hastily before brushing her hair through. The conditioner had done its work, and her golden blonde locks hung like a shining silk curtain to her shoulders, her fringe almost shimmering in the artificial light over the mirror.
She could wear her hair loose today. It was a full ten seconds before she realised she was seriously considering the thought, and for all the wrong reasons. She didn’t want Lucas to be attracted to her, she told herself vehemently, or consider what he had missed by not attempting to take things further last night. She didn’t want him in her life, not in a personal sense. He was too manipulative by half, and far too charismatic—he had already won Melody over, hook, line and sinker, and Maggie had been distinctly mellowed by that outrageously extravagant gesture with the flowers.
She glared at the reflection in the mirror before pulling her hair back so ferociously not a wisp dared escape, and once it was secure she applied her usual light make-up and stood back to survey the result.
Her neatly tailored suit in a sedate navy blue was smart and practical, and the cream blouse underneath buttoned right up to the neck with a demure stand-up collar. She looked every inch the executive secretary, and that was all she wanted to look like.
She would go into work as normal this morning, perform her duties to the best of her ability and return home satisfied in the knowledge she had earnt every penny of the excellent salary.
And if—and, going by Lucas’s departure last night, the if was huge—he should ask her for another date she would refuse, politely and firmly, and stand her ground this time, come hell or high water.
Kim drove into the large car park of Kane Electrical at her usual time and then stared in surprise at the empty space next to her reserved spot. No Aston Martin meant no Lucas.
The reason for this became clear when she reached her office. There was a cream envelope on her desk with her name written on it in Lucas’s unmistakable bold black script. The note the envelope contained was brief and to the point:
Kim, my father contacted me just before midnight from the hospital in Florida where they’d taken him and my mother after the car he was driving burst a tyre at high speed. They have a few broken bones between them but I understand the tree that was foolish enough to get in the way fared worse. I’m flying over to check how things are but hope to return tomorrow. Their telephone number is in the address book in the left-hand drawer of my desk if you need me.
There followed a list of instructions about the pile of work under the envelope, followed by his name. And that was all.
Kim stared at the writing for some time, her mind swirling and her conscience telling her she was dreadful, awful, to think about the formal tenor of the letter at a time like this.
His parents were in hospital and he was obviously worried enough to go shooting off halfway across the world; he probably hadn’t had any sleep or food or anything else, and here was she worrying that the letter seemed…cold, off-hand. And why shouldn’t it be, anyway? she reprimanded herself in the next instant. She was his secretary, that was all. That was all she was.
The day dragged interminably, and whether it was due to the sleepless night she had endured or the amount of correspondence she doggedly worked through Kim wasn’t sure, but by the time she left the building her head was thumping and she was so exhausted she went straight to bed as soon as Melody had gone to sleep.
The next morning she tried to ignore the anticipation that was sending little frissons of sensation down her spine on the drive to Kane Electrical, but as the day progressed and there was no word from Lucas Kim found herself leaping to answer the phone each time it rang, and holding her breath every time she heard voices in the corridor outside.
Five o’clock did eventually make its appearance. Kim slid the cover over her word processor and refused to let the cloud made up of hurt and disappointment and a hundred other confused emotions besides settle over her.
She was glad all this had happened right now, she told herself firmly, as she took the lift down to reception. She might, she just might have been foolish enough to take on board some of the things Lucas had said and done if this hadn’t showed her it was all surface level. The wanting her, his quiet gentleness and compassion when she’d revealed a little of how it had been with Graham, the way he’d set out to charm her and make her laugh during their meal—oh, a million things!
She sighed irritably. She still had a whole truckload of ghosts to lay before she could consider herself free from the past, and confronting some of those personal demons was going to be hard enough as it was.
Yes, this was definitely all for the best. When Lucas arrived back in the office no doubt he would resume the easy working relationship he had adopted before that disastrous kiss, and everything would be back to normal. Whatever that was.
When she and Melody got out of the car a little while later, Kim stood for a moment or two on the drive just looking about her.
It was the first day of April, and the spring evening was cool and mellow with a hint of woodsmoke wafting in the lazy breeze that ruffled the branches of the silver birch at the corner of the front garden.
Underneath the tree a host of sweetly coloured crocuses and primroses were in full bloom, and although the pebbled drive made up the rest of the garden the whole effect was pretty and pleasing. And it was hers, all hers, Kim thought soberly. And she had a great job, and she and Melody were healthy and financially secure for the first time in years—everything was terrific.