“Zola!” Zena nudged Zola again and called her name rather unceremoniously.
“Alton, I love you but—” Zola started, but then her voice cracked and she looked down at her feet.
Not knowing what was happening or what to do, Zena grabbed her elbow as if she was afraid Zola was about to topple over.
“It’s okay,” Alton said softly. “It’s really okay, Z. We don’t have to. It’s okay.”
“What? What’s okay?” Zena said, pulling Zola’s arm then. She looked past Alton at Adan for help, but he appeared just as confused as she felt.
“I can’t,” Zola whispered to her gold gladiator sandals, but her voice was clear and distinct enough for all around to hear the two condemning words one should never say at an altar.
“I know, baby. It’s fine,” Alton said, his voice supportive and encouraging.
Zola found some strength and looked up at Alton with more tears and different tears streaming down. Firmly, she said, “I can’t do this.”
The registrar had forgotten his provisional English and was speaking harsh words in his native Balinese.
“I understand,” Alton said as Adan leaned over to him to say something in his ear.
“No wedding?” the registrar said to Zola.
Before Zola could answer, Zena said over her to the registrar, “Yes, wedding! Yes!”
In a rush, she grabbed Zola’s hand and tugged her down the steps leading away from the gazebo to the beach.
With nowhere to go, she stopped maybe a quarter of a mile from Alton and Adan and with all eyes on her, she asked Zola what was going on.
“I can’t do it. I don’t want to get married right now,” Zola said. “You heard Nyoman. It’s not time.”
“Who cares what that old man said? It’s Alton. You love him,” Zola argued.
“I do love him and I do want to marry him, but I don’t think I want to do it now.”
“But we’re here. That’s why we’re all here, because you said you wanted to marry him now.”
“I think I was doing it because I thought it was going to make me feel better about—” Zola looked off to the water; one of the wildflowers dropped from her crown and floated away in the breeze. “But it hasn’t. And I don’t think marrying Alton will make anything better. It’ll just make everything different.”
Zena reached out and touched her shoulder. “Did you tell him this?”
“We talked about it last night a little—well, a lot. He knows how I feel. But I said I’d still go through with it.” Zola looked back at Zena. “I don’t think I can. Not now.”
“Zola, I hope nothing I said changed your mind. I love Alton, and I know you two belong together,” Zena said.
Zola replied, “No. It’s not you—well, I guess it is, in a way.
“Oh, no! I’m sorry. I—”
“No. Listen. I’m not talking about you discouraging me. I’m talking about you encouraging me,” Zola said. “Another thing Alton and I talked about last night is me taking the Bar Exam. I’m going to do it.”
“What?” Zena pushed surprised.
“I was scared and I was worried and I know now that some of this wedding stuff was also about me putting that off. I can admit that. And I can also admit that you’re right. It is time for me to take the test. You believing in me helped me believe in myself.”
“So what are we going to do?” Zena spied the confused crowd. “You know I’ll support you in whatever you want to do, but these people are expecting a wedding.”
“You know...they can still see a wedding,” Adan said, suddenly stepping into view. “They will see a wedding if you say yes to marrying me.”
Adan reached for Zena’s hand. With no hesitation, he got down on his left knee and asked her, “Zena Nefertiti Shaw, will you marry me?”