His eyes turned distant. ‘Yes.’
‘And?’
His lips curved up a little. ‘It was nice. She was nice. She also sounded beside herself that I’d called.’
‘Beside herself in a good way?’
His eyes met with hers and she could see the lightness in them, the relief. ‘In a very good way. She wants to meet as soon as possible. She wanted to go all in—Lily, me, her husband and all three children, and though it was nice to hear her so excited, I’m not quite ready to expose Lily to that all at once.’
‘Baby steps?’
‘Yes, baby steps. I’ve decided to take Lily to meet her when we get back from Iceland. Then we can talk about meeting the rest of the family. I want to see how Lily takes to her first. I want her to drive this as much as me, if not more...’
Sophia smiled as she looked back to the girl fast asleep in her lap, her soft snore reaching up to them, her thick lashes, so like her father’s, fanned out across her deep golden skin. Beautiful. Angelic. And Sophia felt her love for the little girl swell.
If she was to have Elena’s family in her life then all the better, but Sophia wanted to be in that life too. She wanted to be in both of their lives.
‘What about you, Sophia?’
‘Hmm?’ She looked up at him, blinking her surprise; she’d been so caught up in her depth of feeling she’d lost track of their conversation.
‘Are you going to try and make amends with your family? To speak to them again?’
She gave a gentle sigh. ‘I don’t know. It’s been so long since we talked properly, so long since...since we lost Amy. Maybe it’s too late for us.’
‘It’s never too late, not while your parents are still alive. I’ve told you before how much it would crush me to know Lily was somewhere in the world and scared of reaching out to me. To know that you and your parents have that separation because of something so tragic, something that none of you had any control over...’
He reached for her hand that she hadn’t realised she’d clenched into a fist upon the table and slowly unravelled it to link his fingers through hers. ‘You should try.’
She lowered her gaze to Lily, recalling her thoughts from seconds before, of her love for this child who wasn’t even hers by birth, and she realised how right he was. She also realised the part she’d played in the breakdown of their relationship, the guilt she’d put on herself and projected onto them. She’d labelled herself as guilty and convinced herself that they blamed her too. She’d never given them a chance to prove to her otherwise; she’d never given them a chance to get close again.
She took a shaky breath and nodded. ‘You’re right.’
‘I know I am.’ He said it so sincerely that she couldn’t even laugh at his arrogant acceptance of her words. ‘And this trip is part of you facing up to your past with us by your side. If you can do this, you can do anything.’
She turned to him seconds before his head lowered to hers, his lips soft, gentle, as he kissed her. It wasn’t heated or desperate or needy; it was giving, the passion coming from the fact he cared for her, nothing more, nothing less, and she melted inside, her heart skipping to the beat of his choosing. The knowledge that she loved him was as obvious as the feelings projected in his kiss. She didn’t just care for him, she wasn’t just falling... She had long since fallen and as she opened her eyes and looked up into his she was convinced it was there, being reflected right back at her.
‘Have faith in yourself,’ he murmured as he pulled back and she smiled, leaning into him, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. It was comfortable, relaxed, and just where she belonged.
‘I’ll try.’
* * *
Jack turned and pressed his lips to Sophia’s hair, breathing in the familiar scent of her shampoo and realised just how much he’d missed this. Missed her.
And seeing Lily so at home curled into her lap, to see the drawings spread out before him in all their hopeful glory... So much rested on this holiday, on him opening up to Sophia and being honest about how he felt, how, despite what he had said to the contrary, he had come to care for her...to love her.
Sophia nuzzled into him further, her head gradually getting heavy as her breathing levelled out and he smiled; she was falling asleep too.
He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her in close as he checked his watch. They would be landing soon but he could make the most of the next twenty minutes or so, before he’d have to wake them.
He looked back to the drawings on the table, spreading out the pages with his fingers until one in particular caught his eye...and his heart.
He lifted it out from beneath the pile and stilled, his chest both warm and tight. It was a church, in front of which stood a couple, and just like all the others, they were that couple. His dark skin, his dark hair, contrasted with Sophia’s fair complexion and auburn waves, their hands locked together, a little Lily standing behind, her smile too big for her face. It was a wedding. Their wedding.
A conflicting sense of hope, fear and love swirled up within him, chased down by panic. Panic at Lily’s obvious attachment and the fact that he had let it happen. Panic at his daughter’s dream that this would be in their future and he couldn’t say for certain that it would be. She’d already lost a mother. If he failed, if this relationship ended, she would lose another parental figure too.
Had he made a mistake?