“Hmm…” He eyed the choices on the wall. “I’m not picky. I’ll eat anything.”
“Ditto.”
“You wanna split one, then?” he asked. “How about the supreme?”
“I like the way you think.”
He winked before he went up to the counter and ordered.
The second I was alone in the booth, my face fell and my thoughts turned to the man I hadn’t stopped thinking about. Crewe was always on my mind, and even when I was asleep, he was in my dreams.
I thought I would have forgotten him by now, but I hadn’t. I finally had my life back, the kind of freedom I’d gone six months without having, but it didn’t feel as good as I thought it would. I found myself missing the stone walls of the castle, the comfortable bed I used to sleep in every night, and the view from the bedroom window. I missed listening to Crewe brush his teeth before bed and watching him shave in the morning when he got out of the shower.
Now I felt empty inside.
There was no excitement in my life, just the same mundane routine I did every day. On my days off, I spent time with my friends, but most of them were busy studying for their exams. I didn’t have any family, so there wasn’t anyone to open up to about my struggle.
I wondered if Crewe still thought about me.
Will returned with our number on a stand and two sodas. “It’ll be fifteen minutes.”
I tried to push Crewe out of my mind, but that was almost impossible to do when I was with other men. I hadn’t slept with anyone, but I still felt like I was betraying Crewe in some way. And I felt bad for my dates since they were constantly being compared to the man I’d slept with for the past six months—a duke. “I hope my stomach can manage it.”
“I can order some breadsticks or something.”
“No, it’s okay,” I said quickly. “It’ll ruin my appetite if I eat now.”
“Yeah, me too.” He stared at me and faltered, unsure what to say to keep the conversation going.
Crewe and I never had that problem. We wouldn’t speak for hours, and that was perfectly fine. It was comfortable, actually. “So, you’re an accountant?”
“Yeah. I’ve been working at my dad’s office, but I’m gonna open up my own soon. Just wanted to get a few years of experience before I did that.”
“Not a bad idea.”
“You’re a physician assistant, right?”
I nodded.
“You gonna start medical school again in the fall?” He knew exactly why I dropped out of the program to begin with. Some of the other men I dated treated me like fragile glass, damaged goods. Other men were brave enough to date me, but they had their guard up the whole time.
I didn’t appreciate being looked at like that, like there was something wrong with me. While Crewe shouldn’t have kidnapped me, our relationship was consensual. I had the power to say no whenever I wanted. None of my dates would understand that because I didn’t want to discuss my time in Scotland. “That’s the plan. But I like what I do now.”
“Sounds like a good gig. Plus, you’re getting paid.”
I nodded. “It is nice to buy food and shoes—those are the two things I can’t live without.”
He chuckled, but it didn’t seem genuine.
I was already bored, and we hadn’t even gotten our food yet. None of the guys I met were interesting. They were all the same—educated, nice, and predictable. They lacked the attraction and passion Crewe possessed. Crewe was dark and dangerous, but in a good way. He had infinite layers to his persona, layers I’d never had the chance to peel back. He could make an entire conversation out of a simple look.
He never bored me.
As each week passed, the truth became clearer. Crewe was supposed to leave my thoughts, but his presence only grew in my mind. When I was alone in bed at night, I hardly slept because I missed his powerful body next to mine. My thighs squeezed together because I missed having him between my legs. I even touched myself and thought of him as I did it.
It was getting harder to deny the obvious—that I missed him.
A lot.
Will made small talk about our mutual friends and told me a bit about his family.
I nodded along without really listening, wishing I were home in my apartment with my vibrator—thinking about Crewe. I missed the way his scruff used to rub against my collarbone as he kissed my neck. I missed the way that same facial hair would rub against my inner thighs when he kissed me between my legs. I missed his big, manly hands all over my body, the way they would grip my tits as he fucked me at the edge of the bed.