Lunch is delightful, and it partially takes my mind from what haunts me.
After waving Owen goodbye, I get in my car and wait for Sydney to come out from the ladies’ room.
I reach for my handbag when a shadow passes my side vision. Sweat beams in my forehead as my gaze roams sideways.
Nothing. No one. Only an empty parking lot.
Still, my mind wanders where it shouldn’t. Unease creeps within me like a giant spider, crawling along the door of my car. The ticks of my wristwatch fill the space, and with each tick, trepidation builds in the depths of my psyche. My lips purse and I glance at the rear-view mirror. Not that I would see anything. He’s like the monster I used to think
lived under my bed. Every fibre in my body screams he was there, but my vision never spots him.
The passenger door clicks open. I jump in my seat.
“Whoa.” Sydney settles beside me. “Why are you jumpy?”
“N-Nothing.”
It’s something. Something atrocious. I sit at the edge of a mental breakdown. If I haven’t met my clique today and had a dose of the normality they provide, I would’ve gone nuts.
“I studied psychology.” Sydney’s forefinger darts back and forth as she speaks. “I can tell when you’re lying.”
“No, you can’t.”
“Fine, I can’t.” She rolls her eyes. “But as your friend, I know something is up. Now, spill.”
All the misery I hid thus far comes back to overwhelm me. “I’m scared.” But also excited. How is that possible?
“Of what?”
Of him. A stranger who plagues my dreams. But I also love how he intrudes on my fantasies as if he always belonged in there.
There’s no way to open my heart to Sydney without worrying her or sounding ridiculous.
Or crazy.
“I’m scared of the unknown.” Part truth.
My friend sighs. “You’re brilliant and lovable, there’s nothing to be afraid of.”
“That’s what terrifies me. My entire life’s painted. Sometimes, it seems surreal like this isn’t how it supposed to be and something needs to happen for my whole existence to become right.” I bore my eyes into her soft green ones. “What if something goes wrong, Syd?”
“Then let it go wrong!” She waves her hands in the air. “It’s an authentic fear. It proves you’re human, not some perfect bitch no one can measure up to.”
Despite my biting mood, a chuckle leaves my lips. “I give that kind of impression?”
“It’s worse than that, believe me. I’m being nice because I’m your friend.” Sydney laughs. “But seriously, you’re only twenty-three. Stop thinking like a middle-aged woman and live your goddamn life.”
Sydney is right. Maybe I’m being insecure for no reason.
So what if I met a serial-killer-like stranger in a dark alley?
What if I had nightmares about his darker-than-the-alley eyes every night since?
What if I sense those same eyes on me every second? Even this instant?
Worse, what if I want to keep feeling his eyes on me?
My current state is dangerously close to an erupting storm or a bubble ready to burst any second.