I reached into my purse to check for my pink Coach wallet and my passport. I could have had the doorman hail me a cab, but I wanted to be in the city, not isolated from it by glass and steel. I walked until I found a metro station.
Subways are pretty much the same everywhere, I’ve found. It’s not difficult to get around so long as you understand the color-coding of the different lines and the destinations. The stop labelled Saint-Michel seemed like my best bet, as it would be only a short walk from there to the cafe on the Rue de la Harpe.
Nothing could have prepared me for how gorgeous Parisian underground stations would be. I almost missed my train, soaking up the clean aesthetic. When I arrived at Saint-Michel station, I was almost convinced I had stepped into a stylish old movie.
As I skipped up the steps, the cheerful winter sun greeted me. I walked down the street toward the red awnings Holli had described to me on the phone. Once again, I boggled at the weird twists and turns my life had made lately. I was in Paris. Six months ago, I’d made New Years reservations at my favorite bar, thinking I would be in New York to celebrate. If I’d had any idea...
I would have probably freaked out and run back home to Calumet.
When I pushed through the door, I looked around for Holli, but I didn’t see her. The cafe was pretty dead, with just a couple men sitting at a small table, hunched over their tiny cups of espresso. There was a blonde with short, razored hair and a tight fitting black sweater seated at another table, facing the mirrored back wall. Then she turned, her huge eyes wide in her head, and she squealed, “Sophie!” as she launched herself from her chair.
“Oh my god! Holli!” I rushed at her, not caring about the withering stares of the men quietly chatting at their table. “You cut your hair!”
“They cut it for the show.” She rolled her eyes. “I like it, but it’s going to be such a bitch to grow it out. Sophie, my god! Look at you!”
I looked down at myself. “I... Don’t look any different.”
“You look happier than you did when I left,” she argued, hugging me tight.
“I am happier.” Oh my god, I’d missed her. “I’m happier now that I can see you!”
“Um, you could Skype me, bitch,” she reminded me as we took our seats. “Deja Skypes me every day.”
“I bet she does.” I raised my eyebrows. After I’d had raunchy Skype sex with Neil, Holli had shared all sorts of stories about her internet sexcapades. I knew what she and her girlfriend were getting up to online. “How are things going there?”
“Things are going awesome.” She blushed and grinned. “She said the I-love-you word.”
“I knew she would. Did she do it at the airport?” I’d had the scene already painted in my mind when they’d left for Holli’s flight.
Holli nodded enthusiastically. “It was very romantic.”
A waiter came to take our orders, and Holli helped me out with some truly impressive French.
“Wow, look at you, all Française with your bad self.” I slipped my coat off and arranged it over the back of my chair.
“Well, I took it in college, and a lot of it came back once I was totally immersed.” She shrugged. “Hey, but speaking of romance, fill me in on you and Neil.”
“Well, we didn’t keep the baby,” I told her, even though she already knew that. “And he has cancer, so... That’s not fun.”
“I can imagine. Actually, I can’t.” Holli’s expression fell. “How bad is it?”
“He’s had leukemia for four years, it’s just now getting to the point that they have to do anything serious about it.” I shrugged. I knew it sounded awful and shocking to Holli, but I was getting used to the reality of it. “He’s going to have a stem cell transplant and chemotherapy.”
“Yikes. Are you okay?” Holli reached across the small table, and I gave her hand a squeeze.
“No,” I admitted on a shaky breath. “I’m unemployed, I’ve moved in with my boyfriend of two months, and he might not live the rest of the year. I’m terrified.”
“I don’t understand how you’re not visibly and audibly freaking out.” Holli shook her head. “I’ve never been as serious about someone as I am about Deja, and I know you feel the same way about Neil. I can’t imagine losing her, now that I’ve finally found someone I could consider spending the rest of my life with.”
“I’m just not thinking about it. We have no idea what’s going to happen from here on out, so I’m not going to dwell on how sad I might be eventually.” Total lie. I dwelled on it constantly. I could make a career out of dwelling.